BLOOD OF A POET // writing dump
#21
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[div style="border: transparent; background: transparent; width: 400px; margin-top: 2px; margin-left: 9px; text-align: justify; font-size: 11px; letter-spacing: 1px; text-transform: lowercase;"][font=arial][color=black]i forgive you. for breaking my heart, I forgive you. you didn't mean it, i know you didn't. i think you just got confused along the way to our happiness, you got scared and you ran, you found your out and you took it. i know, it's scary finding your soulmate at such a young age; we were only kids when we met and the world wants us to grow so fast but they laugh at the kids with love in their eyes and flowers growing up through their throats. we were young when we fell in love, we were young when you left me the first time. and when we met again, the love that had never left the first time you did all came rushing back. we were still young but we had grown older. we met again and the world kind of settled down with us, it had been waiting for us to see each other again. and we grew closer than the first time, we were better and ready and he had galaxies burning for us and fate grinning because it's plan for our souls had collided into each other once again. but it was all too much too fast, it always is isn't it? you'll find the person your soul wants to be with but you are human. you were given legs, to run. running, running, running. you were always running to me and that's the problem isn't it? you were always running to me but wouldn't let me catch you. because you are human, led by fear and adrenaline, an anxious, ancient blood running through your veins. you're like a greek god and i the human you fell in love with. you killed me young didn't you? and you were sorry, i know you were. but you were always looking for better things even though you knew the best thing was right there, always waiting by your side with shaking mortal hands and a smile and eyes to adore you with. and that's always been scary hasn't it? the fear of burning? because i set you on fire and you weren't ready to be icarus. and it's been two years since you ran away from me, a year since we've last spoke. and it will always hurt, when i think of you ( my best friend, my greatest love ). it will always hurt like a dull ache in my heart or a crumbling weight in my soul. i will always miss you, you will always be the one made for me, but not the one meant to be. and i love you. it's the simplest truth i know. i loved you. i love you. it's never going to go away, it's always going to be there. and maybe it's true, maybe sometimes you aren't the soulmate of your soulmate. but i remember your eyes when i whispered that i adored you, i remember how big the moon was and that empty road we were driving down. i remember, i remember. i miss you. i constantly miss you. you were the one person i could always talk to about the real things, about my true emotions that i hide deep down. about my overwhelming sadness. we could always talk to each other, you always came to me first and i you. but i forgive you, i swear i do. i forgive you, even though my heart breaks when i think of your name. i forgive you, even though my soul screams out for you. i forgive you, even though my sore throats weeps for a time it could talk freely. i forgive you, i forgive you, i forgive.

&& okay so this writing is like super personal to me, i literally just wrote it down but it's been on my mind for a while. yes, it's based on something that's happened to me. no, i probably won't discuss the actual details? it's something that happened to me two years ago and it just still plagues me to this day. like it makes me really sad and i think about this situation and the person consistently and i know that's sad and effed up but i mean i am kinda sad and messed up so? yeah. just. this post is personal to me but i posted it anyway.


just checking out to hide from life ;
chaosdino #7160 ★ brooke ★ she/her
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#22
[align=center]
[div style="border: transparent; background: transparent; width: 400px; margin-top: 2px; margin-left: 9px; text-align: justify; font-size: 11px; letter-spacing: 1px; text-transform: lowercase;"][font=arial][color=black]do you ever just worry about people? like i could see a stranger sitting alone at a restaurant during breakfast time and get inexplicably sad? because, why are they alone? why doesn't anyone go sit with them? if i am wondering this, why can't i bring myself to go sit with them? i just worry about people i have never met, and the people i have met. i just want people to have good days and to be able to smile. i want people happy. i want people to experience kindness and love and i know i don't express that sometimes ( and i am working on it, i swear ) but i just. sometimes i think about all the shit people have to go through and it keep me up at night. like what if when i was in a bad mood that one day i frowned at someone, and they just really needed a smile. you know? like what if an action i have dismissed has just torn someone down? i hate that i have the power to make people feel like nothing, and i hope that i never ever use that power explicitly for evil. the only kind of power i want over someone is the power to make them smile. i think about this a lot and i know i am not perfect ( i get so overwhelmed in rage sometimes that i can't quell the bitter thoughts and i get so down and antisocial sometimes that the thought of speaking makes me nauseous ). but i am working on me and i hope i never make someone feel sad and worthless.


just checking out to hide from life ;
chaosdino #7160 ★ brooke ★ she/her
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#23
[align=center]
[div style="border: transparent; background: transparent; width: 400px; margin-top: 2px; margin-left: 9px; text-align: justify; font-size: 11px; letter-spacing: 1px; text-transform: lowercase;"][font=arial][color=black]he's icarus, i swear that's where his soul comes from. i have never seen the light long to caress someone as much as it does him. the sleepy tendrils of the sun call out to him, aching for him, longing to touch him but the closest they can come it painting him in golden hues. lucky me, the sun doesn't get to burn him up this time. i get him, i get him, i get him. and i can love him right, adore him with my soft hands and sensitive heart. he's the gold in my soul, he is my icarus and i'll be the sun's second chance at love.

to juno from my character, rory oakley's, perspective


just checking out to hide from life ;
chaosdino #7160 ★ brooke ★ she/her
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