06-16-2022, 07:29 PM
[align=center][div style="width: 450px; text-align: justify; font-family: new times roman; font-size: 8pt; letter-spacing: 2.5px; word-spacing: 1px; line-height: 14px;"]tw. mention of gore, death, miscarriage
As a child he had little more than a book and an overgrown backyard to distract him from desolation of back o' town. And even today he tended to live in a fantasy that he had conjured in his mind, a reality so far from the truth and yet one that he had willed upon himself with such tenacity. He would insist that his childhood was fantastic, all whilst still squirming even to this day at the sight of blood and bludgeoning. It was impossible to erase the memory of Mama. She had been mangled almost beyond recognition, and a young boy should never have to witness an act so barbaric.
His life had otherwise been okay, of course disregarding Papa's negligence in raising the two boys that would be left alone for days at a time in their juvenescence. Disregarding Teddy's obstinate determination to prove to Papa that he was indeed worth a fraction of his approval. Laurent and Teddy had been butting heads ever since Papa returned to his boys to lap up the success of The Badlands. Papa didn't deserve an ounce of their success, Laurent would hiss so assertively. Papa was a sorry excuse of a father. In response, he'd only be met with a scoff from Teddy. It was difficult to come to terms with the fact that Laurent was probably entirely right. Papa didn't deserve a second, or third, or fourth chance. If anything, the Knope brothers deserved a father that hadn't been absent for the entirety of their lives up until their prosperity. Teddy had achieved the fortune that Papa had always chased, and only then would Papa treat him like a son.
And Teddy kind of loved feeling loved, or at least pretending that this was what it was meant to feel like. The feeling of familial love. After all, for the majority of his life, the only family he really did have was his brother and, whilst they were an unstoppable force, they never always got along. Laurent was weary from all the years of a lost childhood so that he could maintain Teddy's innocence for just a few years longer. Teddy had never really acknowledged the things that Laurent had done in the name of brotherhood, and perhaps sometimes he seemed ungrateful at the best of times. Admittedly, Laurent's intuition was often pretty bang on the money, even whilst Teddy refused to acknowledge that there was a chance that Papa was in The Badlands for greed, not for his family.
But a storm was brewing in the horizon.
The past several weeks had been quiet for The Badlands, and sometimes the quiet meant that things were going favourably for them. The nightlife was buzzing and the group was undoubtedly a force to be reckoned with. But, whilst Teddy was lavished with the riches of his hard work, spending many a night partying and relishing in the limelight. This was Teddy's world, he so confidently assumed, and everything was going perfectly. And so when Tatiana had told him that she had fallen pregnant once more, his thoughts were sent down a spiral of emotions.
This felt different than the last time, however. Last time, he was afraid. Hell, Teddy avoided Tatiana for a week straight upon finding out that he would have to shelve his life as a beloved bachelor so that he could take on the role of a father. But before he could even have the chance to mature into a man more suited to be a father, Tatiana left him. Weeks had gone by where Teddy had been desolate, keeping his bed warm his faces he'd soon forget, names he cared not remember. He had no idea where she could have gone to, and no idea that their unborn child had since been lost. They were going to have a baby; instead, they had an angel. Eden Story Knope, a name that they had decided upon in one of the very last conversations they had before their relationship had been turned on its head. And it was a story that would forever remain untold.
Upon Tatiana's return and subsequent announcement in secret that she had suffered the loss of their child, Teddy's heart felt as if it had been desecrated. His emotions were in turmoil. He hadn't wanted a child, and yet he grieved nonetheless. And the look in Tatiana's eyes was a look so indescribable. He had done this to her. He had broken her, and that was a pain he wasn't willing to bear. So Teddy promised that he would vow to be a better man for Tatiana and, whilst he had never uttered the word girlfriend to her in his life, he would assure that his heart was hers only.
And, as if love was the key to their joy, Tatiana had soon found herself with child once more. Teddy fretted with an insufferable, paralysing fear that they would only end up grieving all over again, and so they chose to keep their announcement to themselves. Teddy could never open up to anyone about loss. So they were cautious. Excited. Up until now, no one but the couple had known of their news. Initially, he was indeed worried about how he'd be as a father but eventually the idea of parenthood had grown on him. Maybe he'd become the dernier cri of fatherhood, a father better than Papa could ever be.
And then it had hit him.
Papa had never been a good father to him at all.
And finally, after all of these years, the pieces had all clicked. All of this desperation for approval had turned into a resentment for ever feeling the need to break his back for Papa's validation. No child should ever have to feel as if love was conditional, as if commitment meant that one day it would end with disappointment and heartbreak. Soon the word ❝ Papa ❞ would rot in his mouth. Teddy would raise his child far better — he was sure of himself — with more love and compassion than Papa had ever given his boys. And Teddy was good with Laurent's kids so if he was a good uncle he'd make a good father, too.
For the first time in his life, Teddy liked the idea of forever with Tatiana. He liked the idea of giving his new family the life he never had. This time, he'd make things right.
❝ Everyone— ❞ Teddy would announce as he stood up at one of the tables in the centre of the casino, wandering to stand behind the chair where Tatiana sat beside him, resting his hands fondly on her shoulders. ❝ We'll all be festing tonight. I want the band, I want the drinks, I want all of y'all up and celebratin'. ❞ Massaging Tatiana's shoulders gently, Teddy shifted his gaze over towards his brother, Laurent bunching his brows together knowingly before lowering his gaze to tap ash from his cigarette into a nearby ashtray. ❝ After all, Anya and I are going to be parents. ❞ He began to grin from ear to ear as made men began to congratulate the couple, the room buzzing with heightened conversations of excitement for them.
Teddy's eyes scanned the casino with a smug smile sat crookedly on his lips, basking in the delirium of celebrations before leaning down to wrap his arms around Tatiana and press a kiss against her temple. ❝ Tu es mon coeur.[sup]1[/sup] ❞ He murmured to himself, breath warm against her ear. ❝ Comment pourrais-je vivre sans mon coeur?[sup]2[/sup]... How could I live without you? ❞ Soon, he was distracted by a hand squeezing his shoulder, Teddy straightening up to meet a made man handing a drink over to him. Oh, Teddy's favourite drink as well. ❝ A Bahama Mama? ❞ He confirmed before grinning as the made man nodded. ❝ I could kiss ya. ❞ He hummed as he thrived in the spotlight, a place he thoroughly enjoyed residing in, as he took a sip of his drink.
But then, he looked towards where Laurent had been sitting once more, only to find that his brother was leaving the casino. Lips faltered ever-so-slightly, jaw growing rigid before turning his attention back onto to Tatiana, attempting to give her a reassuring wink and smile before holding his hand out for her to take. He needed to do something to distract himself from the disappointment of his brother's actions, and so he'd focus on the only person that he felt mattered to him in that room. ❝ How about a mocktail for ya? ❞ He offered, wagging his brows playfully before pointing out, ❝ I can make a mean virgin margarita, ya know? ❞
[sup]1[/sup] You are my heart.
[sup]2[/sup] How could I live without my heart?
As a child he had little more than a book and an overgrown backyard to distract him from desolation of back o' town. And even today he tended to live in a fantasy that he had conjured in his mind, a reality so far from the truth and yet one that he had willed upon himself with such tenacity. He would insist that his childhood was fantastic, all whilst still squirming even to this day at the sight of blood and bludgeoning. It was impossible to erase the memory of Mama. She had been mangled almost beyond recognition, and a young boy should never have to witness an act so barbaric.
His life had otherwise been okay, of course disregarding Papa's negligence in raising the two boys that would be left alone for days at a time in their juvenescence. Disregarding Teddy's obstinate determination to prove to Papa that he was indeed worth a fraction of his approval. Laurent and Teddy had been butting heads ever since Papa returned to his boys to lap up the success of The Badlands. Papa didn't deserve an ounce of their success, Laurent would hiss so assertively. Papa was a sorry excuse of a father. In response, he'd only be met with a scoff from Teddy. It was difficult to come to terms with the fact that Laurent was probably entirely right. Papa didn't deserve a second, or third, or fourth chance. If anything, the Knope brothers deserved a father that hadn't been absent for the entirety of their lives up until their prosperity. Teddy had achieved the fortune that Papa had always chased, and only then would Papa treat him like a son.
And Teddy kind of loved feeling loved, or at least pretending that this was what it was meant to feel like. The feeling of familial love. After all, for the majority of his life, the only family he really did have was his brother and, whilst they were an unstoppable force, they never always got along. Laurent was weary from all the years of a lost childhood so that he could maintain Teddy's innocence for just a few years longer. Teddy had never really acknowledged the things that Laurent had done in the name of brotherhood, and perhaps sometimes he seemed ungrateful at the best of times. Admittedly, Laurent's intuition was often pretty bang on the money, even whilst Teddy refused to acknowledge that there was a chance that Papa was in The Badlands for greed, not for his family.
But a storm was brewing in the horizon.
The past several weeks had been quiet for The Badlands, and sometimes the quiet meant that things were going favourably for them. The nightlife was buzzing and the group was undoubtedly a force to be reckoned with. But, whilst Teddy was lavished with the riches of his hard work, spending many a night partying and relishing in the limelight. This was Teddy's world, he so confidently assumed, and everything was going perfectly. And so when Tatiana had told him that she had fallen pregnant once more, his thoughts were sent down a spiral of emotions.
This felt different than the last time, however. Last time, he was afraid. Hell, Teddy avoided Tatiana for a week straight upon finding out that he would have to shelve his life as a beloved bachelor so that he could take on the role of a father. But before he could even have the chance to mature into a man more suited to be a father, Tatiana left him. Weeks had gone by where Teddy had been desolate, keeping his bed warm his faces he'd soon forget, names he cared not remember. He had no idea where she could have gone to, and no idea that their unborn child had since been lost. They were going to have a baby; instead, they had an angel. Eden Story Knope, a name that they had decided upon in one of the very last conversations they had before their relationship had been turned on its head. And it was a story that would forever remain untold.
Upon Tatiana's return and subsequent announcement in secret that she had suffered the loss of their child, Teddy's heart felt as if it had been desecrated. His emotions were in turmoil. He hadn't wanted a child, and yet he grieved nonetheless. And the look in Tatiana's eyes was a look so indescribable. He had done this to her. He had broken her, and that was a pain he wasn't willing to bear. So Teddy promised that he would vow to be a better man for Tatiana and, whilst he had never uttered the word girlfriend to her in his life, he would assure that his heart was hers only.
And, as if love was the key to their joy, Tatiana had soon found herself with child once more. Teddy fretted with an insufferable, paralysing fear that they would only end up grieving all over again, and so they chose to keep their announcement to themselves. Teddy could never open up to anyone about loss. So they were cautious. Excited. Up until now, no one but the couple had known of their news. Initially, he was indeed worried about how he'd be as a father but eventually the idea of parenthood had grown on him. Maybe he'd become the dernier cri of fatherhood, a father better than Papa could ever be.
And then it had hit him.
Papa had never been a good father to him at all.
And finally, after all of these years, the pieces had all clicked. All of this desperation for approval had turned into a resentment for ever feeling the need to break his back for Papa's validation. No child should ever have to feel as if love was conditional, as if commitment meant that one day it would end with disappointment and heartbreak. Soon the word ❝ Papa ❞ would rot in his mouth. Teddy would raise his child far better — he was sure of himself — with more love and compassion than Papa had ever given his boys. And Teddy was good with Laurent's kids so if he was a good uncle he'd make a good father, too.
For the first time in his life, Teddy liked the idea of forever with Tatiana. He liked the idea of giving his new family the life he never had. This time, he'd make things right.
❝ Everyone— ❞ Teddy would announce as he stood up at one of the tables in the centre of the casino, wandering to stand behind the chair where Tatiana sat beside him, resting his hands fondly on her shoulders. ❝ We'll all be festing tonight. I want the band, I want the drinks, I want all of y'all up and celebratin'. ❞ Massaging Tatiana's shoulders gently, Teddy shifted his gaze over towards his brother, Laurent bunching his brows together knowingly before lowering his gaze to tap ash from his cigarette into a nearby ashtray. ❝ After all, Anya and I are going to be parents. ❞ He began to grin from ear to ear as made men began to congratulate the couple, the room buzzing with heightened conversations of excitement for them.
Teddy's eyes scanned the casino with a smug smile sat crookedly on his lips, basking in the delirium of celebrations before leaning down to wrap his arms around Tatiana and press a kiss against her temple. ❝ Tu es mon coeur.[sup]1[/sup] ❞ He murmured to himself, breath warm against her ear. ❝ Comment pourrais-je vivre sans mon coeur?[sup]2[/sup]... How could I live without you? ❞ Soon, he was distracted by a hand squeezing his shoulder, Teddy straightening up to meet a made man handing a drink over to him. Oh, Teddy's favourite drink as well. ❝ A Bahama Mama? ❞ He confirmed before grinning as the made man nodded. ❝ I could kiss ya. ❞ He hummed as he thrived in the spotlight, a place he thoroughly enjoyed residing in, as he took a sip of his drink.
But then, he looked towards where Laurent had been sitting once more, only to find that his brother was leaving the casino. Lips faltered ever-so-slightly, jaw growing rigid before turning his attention back onto to Tatiana, attempting to give her a reassuring wink and smile before holding his hand out for her to take. He needed to do something to distract himself from the disappointment of his brother's actions, and so he'd focus on the only person that he felt mattered to him in that room. ❝ How about a mocktail for ya? ❞ He offered, wagging his brows playfully before pointing out, ❝ I can make a mean virgin margarita, ya know? ❞
[sup]1[/sup] You are my heart.
[sup]2[/sup] How could I live without my heart?
[align=center][div style="width: 400px; font-family: verdana; text-align: justify; font-size: 6pt; line-height: 1.4; letter-spacing: 0.5px; word-spacing: 2px; margin-bottom: 5px;"]✧･ﾟ: I'VE BEEN IN LIKE A THOUSAND TIMES, DATED EVERY WOMAN IN THE ATMOSPHERE. I'VE BEEN TO EVERY CONTINENT, BROKEN ALL THE HEARTS IN EVERY HEMISPHERE, AND IF I'M NOT THE TYPE OF GUY YOU LIKE TO CIRCUMVENT, JUST REMEMBER NOT TO LOVE ME WHEN I DISAPPEAR. I GRADUATED AT THE TOP, I LIKE TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THE BOURGEOISIE . . .