「 let me let you go 」— open.

[truce.]

[align=center][div style="width: 400px; text-align: justify; font-family: verdana; font-size: 7pt; line-height: 1.5;"]･ﾟ✧ — Lip jutted out very slightly, she was too used to being the cheerful girl. Like the warmth of the sun on a summers day, Ellie had been so accustomed to showing off her beaming smile and the warming glow of her gentle nature that it felt out of her character to cry. Lips pressed together to form a thin line, she grimaced to herself whilst she waited by the wood stove for water to boil. She'd not allow herself to grieve over Mick anymore - this hurt was becoming obsessive. Swallowing hard to try remove the lump in her throat, she furrowed her eyebrows sternly as she took the water and then poured it into her mug, making herself some herbal tea.

It'd been four months since her engagement with the man who had such beautiful eyes had been called off, and her heart still ached every moment of every day. But alas, he appeared just fine moving on, so why couldn't she do the same, too? Her bottom lip wobbled, almost as if it were a dam struggling to hold back a flood. But then, the waterworks began just as said dam crumbled. Shakily lowering the pot into the sink, Ellie quickly used her now free hand to swat at her cheek, briskly hiding any evidence of her internal conflict. She couldn't cry. Not over him. Not anymore.

She slowly raised the steaming mug up to her lips, hands trembling as her heart raced anxiously. When she was feeling this way, the downwards spiral was often a swift one. Internal conflict would result in crying which would result in stress which would result in a panic attack; it was an unfortunate pattern which she'd learned to pick up over the years, yet a pattern she wasn't quite sure how to ever break out of. And so, she'd attempt to deny that she was feeling anything at all. Numb herself from the pain. She sipped on her tea, though the liquid burned as she swallowed hesitantly. She wasn't sure if the next few tears were from the pain of burning herself or from the pain of her permanently broken heart, but she'd given up on trying to hide the saline tears from herself.

Instead, she stared out the window at the winter wonderland glistening outside, fresh snow settled on the ground appearing so serene and untouched. Ellie inhaled deeply. Warm mug held close to her, all she'd allow herself to do was gaze outside, body still and awkward as she stood silent in her grief.

[JAY]

[align=center][div style="width: 500px; text-align: justify; font-family: helvetica; font-size: 9pt; line-height: 1.4;"]The man knew all too well what it was like to love and lose someone.

His past experiences had been part of the reason why he ended up here in the first place. It was for the best, though — staying back home would have just reminded him every day of what had been stripped away. This place seemed nice enough; it was warm and smelled of pine needles and freshly chopped wood. Today, the downstairs of the Lodge held stronger smell, apparently that of a certain essence. There, standing by the window, stood the young woman Elinor who Jay had acquainted himself with over the past week. He wouldn't consider himself a super friendly guy, but he found himself enjoying chatting with her. She wasn't bothersome or annoying.

"Is that tea?" Jay strolled over, hands in his pockets. "I'm more of a whiskey and coffee kind of guy." Not really. Maybe he had been at one point, but 1) Both were hard to come by these days and 2) He was no longer a borderline alcoholic. Whiskey for breakfast? Yeah, no thanks. Jay was no longer trying to deteriorate his body by guzzling that stuff day and night. He had long gotten over his stages of grief and bitterness and trying to forget, although those negative memories popped up often.

As one did in normal human interaction, his blue-gray gaze flickered over towards the female's features as he awaited a response. When he did so, he noticed the redness as well as wetness around her eyes. Anybody could put two-and-two together and notice that she was, indeed, crying. This was... this was not normal, not from what he had seen of Elinor so far. She was a genuine and kind-hearted woman who never seemed down. Then again, everybody had emotions — even the sweet ones.

So, the masculine features shifted from a relatively casual expression to that of a more furrowed and concerned one. He turned more towards her and tilted his head as to get a gander at her visage. The man didn't want to sound pushy, so he would softly ask, "Somethin' wrong? Why the tears?" Perhaps Elinor would feel better in confiding in someone else, even if they weren't exactly the closest. If not? Then he'd leave her be. He knew first-hand that it was frustrating when someone was obnoxious in trying to "help" him with his issues... especially when said issues took time and patience to heal.

[truce.]

[align=center][div style="width: 400px; text-align: justify; font-family: verdana; font-size: 7pt; line-height: 1.5;"]･ﾟ✧ — For those who knew Ellie, it was clear to begin to notice that her life revolved around a daydream. She could see the world with such vibrancy and color, and her optimism-filled mindset could only cause one thing to lead to another... and, if her perfect world began to crumble in front of her eyes, she was bound to fall apart. First, the electricity had gone out and Ellie was unable to contact her family. She'd not seen them since. Then, she began to feel trapped in a world of gangs and violence - this was not the sweet and honorable lifestyle she wanted to share with her Mickey.

But then, she slowly began to lose her love through post-traumatic stress and a sudden realization that he could not be with her if his heart wasn't in the right place. He was soon gone from her life. A stranger once again. They'd lost their child, the sweet spaniel called Winnie, to Elllie's own stupidity; slowly, one by one, Ellie began to lose every aspect of the perfect life she'd dreamed of. She felt like a widow - not only was her engagement called off, but she watched helplessly as a piece of Mick died too in that very moment. Ellie's heart was unable to mend - all that she'd ever dreamed of was crushed, and she didn't think she was able to pick herself up after this.

Sure, it seemed dramatic, but no one but Ellie herself could quite fathom the hurt she felt at the knowledge that her dreamy world had come crashing down. That was the only thing that motivated her. And, besides, when she lost Mick, a piece of her heart went along with him. He had been everything to her. He was her rock, her safety net whenever she felt afraid. And now, she was completely alone to fend for herself, because he didn't seem to want to have anything to do with her anymore. She swallowed hard, trying her very best to dissolve the lump that sat in her throat, till a voice startled her out of her sullen contemplation.

Jay. Ellie had become quite fond of Jay over the past week or so - from the conversations that they'd been having, they seemed to be getting along swimmingly. Ellie was a friendly face who seemed to get on with almost anyone, with that being said, but regardless, she had a soft spot for the Southern sweetheart. He was kind to her, despite seemingly somewhat aloof. And honestly, she couldn't have hoped for a better person to have come walk in on her crying (not that she was expecting anybody to walk in, might she add) than somebody who was kind to her. Her head turned, biting down on her lip roughly as she exchanged glances with the man, eyebrows knitting together slightly before she attempted a sad smile. "Sorry... It's nothing, really." She sniffled, voice sounding slightly more nasally than usual. "Just... Had something on my mind." Choosing to settle on that very brief explanation for her tears, she knew that she couldn't overwhelm the man with all of her problems; it'd be mean to do so.

And so, instead, she turned around so that she could lean against the counter, wiping a tear away before laughing awkwardly to herself. "Sorry... For this." Finally, she took a deep breath before very obviously attempting to change the topic of conversation. "Whiskey and coffee, hm? I may not know where to find the whiskey nor coffee in the Lodge, but this tea is lovely." She smiled faintly, blinking her puffy, bloodshot eyes. "I... I can make you a cup, if you want?" And with that, before he could even answer, she was quick to fill the pot up with water again, placing on the stove. Anything to get her to forget about her grief for just a moment. But then, anxiously digging her nails into her hands, she finally cracked, lip wobbling as she watched the flames heat up the water below. "I'm just being oversensitive today... Just missing someone a little more than usual, I suppose."

[HAYLEY]

[align=center][div style="width: 430px; text-align: justify; font-family: calibri; font-size: 8pt; color: black; line-height: 22px;"]☁  hayley chase had never once in her life cried over a man. perhaps it was her noncommittal attitude, or her habit of leaving them before they could leave her, but even the few times she'd been broken up with, she hadn't really cared. she'd shrug her shoulder, pick up her purse, and wave goodbye. the only time a man had made her cry was jackson, and it had nothing to do with him, but the fact that sleeping with him had gotten her pregnant, and she really, really hadn't wanted to be pregnant, though in retrospect it was the best mistake she'd ever made. it had given her hope, and her daughter was all that mattered anymore.

jackson was in the living room, playing with their daughter, and for the last half an hour, she'd been with them, no doubt looking like the happiest little family. there were problems, horrible, deep rooted ones, in the relationship. jackson loved her, but he only loved the parts of her she let him see. and she would never love him. as far as she'd ever been concerned, she was incapable of loving another human being, and while hope had flipped that on it's head, she was the exception, not the rule. jackson loved a part of her, and hayley would never love him, and that was a relationship doomed from the start. but they both chose to ignore the problems, to deal with what they had for hope's sake. to give her a mother and a father and some version of a cliche, nuclear family. something normal, or at least in the ballpark.

she was heading into the kitchen with the intention of putting a pot of water on the stove when she stumbled across the scene. ellie crying, jay consoling her. a part of her, the very female part, demanded she walk away. this was a moment, at least in her eyes, and she shouldn't disturb it. but there was another part of her, the part that was the mother of a little girl who'd one day grow up and cry over something, someone, and that part won in the end.

❝oh my god, ellie, sweetie,❞ she said, sounding like such a mother as she moved towards the blonde, arms opening in an attempt to hug her, her own eyes tearing up, no doubt a side effect of mommy-hormones, ❝you're gonna make me cry.❞ she said, having to sniffle just a bit to fight the urge. pulling out of the hug, she wiped at her eyes, clearing her throat. ❝whoever it is, they're not worth you crying those pretty eyes out.❞ she said, grabbing a napkin off the counter to wipe her eyes, and grabbing another to offer to ellie. ❝whoever it is, fuck 'em. you've got me, you've got hope, you've got jay-❞ she inclined her head to the man ❝-and the rest of us.❞ she was shit at consoling people and she knew it, especially a woman five years older than her, but hormones could do weird things to you.

[JAY]

[align=center][div style="width: 450px; text-align: justify; font-size: 8pt; font-family: calibri; letter-spacing: 1px; color: ;"]Thoughts were killers, and that was a fact. People thought too much and overreacted and, as a result, became more paranoid or sad than they ought to be. Jay knew what it was like to focus on something in the past, and he knew what it was like to have it completely take over and drag you down to rock bottom. It was one hell of a feeling, one that certainly did nobody any good. He blinked slowly, watching as she tried to brush her obvious emotions off as "nothing". ❝ It sure as hell don't look like nothin'. ❞ He replied, sarcastic in his normal manner although not as biting or harsh in tone. Ellie didn't deserve his blunt attitude.

When she offered him tea, he shook his head and said, ❝ 's alright. I think you'll be needin' it more than  me. ❞ Tea was soothing, truth be told, and he had really ought to try more of it even though he was more of a coffee person. "Just missing someone a little more than usual," Hell, wasn't that the truth for a lot of people. In this shithole of a world, it was easier to lose your loved ones. He tended to notice that a lot of people were completely on their own, trying to lead a new life without their families. It was hard. ❝ Oh, ❞ Jay breathed, taking in this information and now trying to think of something to say. He pursed his lips, and looked out the window as well at the powdery snowfall. ❝ Well, we all know the feelin'. ❞ A few moments later, he would add, ❝ Most of us, anyways. ❞ Some people liked it better to be independent.

Hayley had come around to help console the somber woman as well ( thank god ). He didn't consider himself to be the most comforting person to be around. ❝ She's right. ❞ Jay gave a soft nod to Hayley out of acknowledgement. ❝ The best you can do for yourself is try to move on. Things, uh.. won't get better if you don't let 'em. ❞ Jay knew a lot of things, and could provide some depthful insight if needed, but this was a battle he was trying to overcome himself ( believe it or not ). As much as he tried to listen to his own advice and try to suppress the negative feelings that he built up, he slipped sometimes, and he didn't blame Ellie if she did the same.

[truce.]

[align=center][div style="width: 400px; text-align: justify; font-family: verdana; font-size: 7pt; line-height: 1.5;"]･ﾟ✧ — Before Ellie could fully comprehend what was going on, her bloodshot eyes wandered over to Hayley who had just entered the kitchen. A sad smile plastered her lips, unable to falter as she froze like a statue. If she stayed this way, she could be fake happy and nobody would suspect a thing. But, alas, she was evidently fooling nobody. Fanning at her face, one to try miraculously dry out of tears staining her cheeks and two trying to cool her red face down as it burned with humiliation, Hayley's kindness was enough to cause Ellie to crack. Lips pulled down and wobbling distraught, it didn't take her long before the tears began to fall again and she wrapped her arms around Hayley's neck, feeling enveloped and comforted in her friend's hug.

"Oh, I'm so sorry." Ellie squeaked, finally pulling away from the hug before laughing, partly from guilt and partly from humor. "Don't you cry now, Hay; that's my job." She swallowed hard, thanking the brunette quietly as she took a napkin from her to dab at her eyes. Her gaze turned over to Jay, eyebrows knitting together as she pouted over at him. Their words were kind. Their words made Ellie think that she most likely wasn't the only person who'd felt this kind of pain before; she would never be alone in the hurt. "You are both so good to me." She admitted softly, pausing to blow her nose before repeating more firmly, "So, so good."

In that very moment, the blonde woman was quick to begin to realize that these people surrounding her were slowly but surely becoming her family. Hayley was most certainly right in saying that she would always have them - after all, family was forever. She reached out slowly, placing a thankful and affectionate hand on Jay's arm, cracking him a weak and wobbly smile before she peered over at Hayley. "I'll be okay, I think... Just need some time to get over... Him... Thank you both for everything." Despite the smiles, though, she couldn't continue to play pretend. She was hurting, and she had to accept the hurt in order to move on.