HELLBENT ON LOVING YOU / p

[dannychan]

kylo really wasn’t much better. he had learned to cry silently, keep his voice steady and just let tears fall. most nights he got so drunk he just passed out. he took out his anger on anything he could, and at one point he even considered just.. giving up. offing himself. plunging his saber right into his stomach kind of giving up, but.. he couldn’t bring himself to do it. he stayed for hux, but as the years went on and on.. it got harder and harder. he hardly felt anymore. when phasma nudged him, he would look to hux and felt his lips quiver slightly, his eyes filling with tears almost instantly. he hesitated and nodded, moving over and clearing his throat. “go rest, general.” he said, trying to will him to do it using the force, ignoring the tears that started to fall under his mask and keeping his voice steady.