[align=center] [table] | | | [/table] RELATIONSHIPS II
tea? this might not be needed depending on how I decide to structure the last post. this prob won't be needed at all, actually. hah. fuck.
I HAD THIS FEELING THAT YOU'D BETRAY ME ——————
IF I GAVE TOO MUCH AND YOU TOOK TOO MUCH ——————
there's blood on the leaves / there's blood on the sands I ——————
FEEL HIS GRACE S L O W L Y RUNNING OUT ——————
GIVE ME TRUTH GIVE ME A WAY OUT (I GOT A BONE TO PICK) ——————
[align=center] SOMEBODY [I]SHOWED YOU ALL OF THE HORRORS YOU WEREN'T BORN WITH IT ——————
[align=center] [table] | | | [/table] HISTORY
On November 27th, 2017 two things happened at the same time. One: the lights went out. Two: Scott Mathew Darrow (later changed to Catalyst) was born. The generators kicked up soon after their birth, but it wasn't long before their entire area was powered out, among the first places that were hit by the virus. They were born male, and used masculine pronouns up until they were about thirteen, at which point they started using they/them pronouns only. They would prefer masculine pronouns to feminine ones, but overall prefer neutral ones and will be quick to correct anyone that misgenders them.
They were born to Molly Louise Castelle and Austin Robert Darrow, high school sweethearts that got married right after they graduated. They managed to buy a house in a decent suburban neighborhood, and a few years after that they had Catalyst. Austin's family decided they wanted to move to somewhere that still had power, but Austin and Molly refused, not wanting to leave behind the house they'd bought instead of going to college. That ended up being a bit of a mistake, as when Cat was only three years old, Austin fell deathly ill. He ended up leaving to either seek out treatment and return when healthy, or pass where his family wouldn't have to witness. He never came back, so it was assumed that he died.
From then on, their world pretty much was filled only by their mother. Sometimes their maternal grandmother Angeline Castelle would visit, always bossing them around but bringing candy. As Angeline got older, they started planning on her moving in with them, though she passed before that could happen. Cat's maternal grandfather Scott Castelle (for whom they're named for) died when their mother was still young.
The other kids in their neighborhood didn't like them, so they almost always stayed home and played alone, with Molly, or read. As a kid they loved singing and making up songs, playing with toy cars, reading Narnia in the closet or trying to convert the house into Hogwarts with their mother's help. Things with the neighborhood kids came to a problematic head when they were nine, tired of their exclusion and bullying they punched one of the older kids. This caused a bit of a mob to form, chasing them back to their house and camping outside the house for much of the night. Cat had been afraid, but what really made them scared was when they realized that Molly was afraid too, causing them to impulsively decide that the best thing for both of them both was for them to run away.
Which is just what they did. Shortly after running away they joined The Young Rogues, a group consisting of kids and teens that hate the adults of the world. It was a message that they had never been able to buy into, as before that point the only kindness they had ever received came from adults and these new ones only seemed marginally better than the ones they had left behind. They seemed far more violent, too, something that made them afraid of their would-be peers. While some of the Rogues might have been willing to connect, they were not and ended up leaving the Young Rogues after two years upon realizing that there was nothing stopping them from leaving. Well, that and that they now had more skills that might allow them to survive on their own.
It wasn't too long after leaving that the Young Rogues that they were taken in by a man named Derick Harris. He took them into his family, consisting of his wife Susanna Harris, son Louie Harris and twin daughters Lilian and Vivian Harris. Cat became close with Derick, but always got the sense that Susanna and the twins only went along with it because it's what he wanted, and to a lesser extent, Louie. Life with them was far from perfect; they always knew they were the outsider in the family, but they were well taken care of. Derick gave them a good education and became their confidant.
When they were thirteen, Derick came up with the idea of involving Cat in his apocalypse cult, turning true facts about their life and using those to fuel a story of how they were some sort of god, that their birth signaled the apocalypse. They never actually believed this, but they went along with it and over time changed to fit the role that Derick had created, even changing their name to Catalyst and leaving their old one behind for good. While previously, the violence of the Young Rogues had scared them, Derick eased them into a culture of violence and over time Cat not only became used to it, they thrived in it. The shift in their personality was gradual, but by the end of it you'd hardly be able to recognize them.
Once they were fully involved with the cult (Mourningstar), that became a significant part of their world. They had to play the part constantly, so they learned to keep all of their internal thoughts and feelings locked up inside, never showing anything. They came to play the part quite well, becoming as adept at manipulation as Derick. They spent much of their time with the other cultists around their age: Louie, Honey Kane and Gerard Anderson. The later got them into quite a bit of trouble, picking numerous fights over the years and making them fight for him. It was largely through these fights that they learned how to handle themself in combat.
They didn't always win, and even when they did win they were rarely unscathed. Typically, when they got beat up, the person that would patch them up after was a girl named Susie. She wasn't in the cult, working in the bar in the town near where Mourningstar was located. Her lack of affiliation with the cult actually made her something of a rock to Cat, a tether, their connection to sane thinking and reality. Susie became their first real, genuine friend, and over time they even developed a crush on her. However, something happened that caused them to cut contact with her, only speaking to her again when they told her that they were leaving. She asked if they were going to ask her to go with them, and the refused.
When Catalyst was eighteen they left Mourningstar, unable to stand being there any longer for a variety of reasons. They traveled around for a couple years, never staying anywhere for long or forming meaningful connections with anyone that they met. That changed when they joined the Badlands just shy of their twenty-first birthday. The then leader, Parks, left them in charge. Their reign was brief, lasting only a few minutes after their first meeting, due to the challenge they issued. Someone, specifically Tydeus, took it upon himself to rise to the challenge. He knocked Cat out from behind and made them a Worm, chaining them up in a warehouse under the guard of a man named Jeremy.
This situation lasted only a few weeks, ending when Tydeus released them and left. Driven by a sense of fate, Cat left to try and find him, eventually succeeding but becoming frustrated when they found him in the company of Bonesaw, they bailed and made their way back to the Badlands, unwillingly falling into the company of a boy named Russel, who followed them back to the Badlands and joined alongside them, much to their chagrin.
//wip
I HAD THIS FEELING THAT YOU'D BETRAY ME ——————
IF I GAVE TOO MUCH AND YOU TOOK TOO MUCH ——————
there's blood on the leaves / there's blood on the sands I ——————
FEEL HIS GRACE S L O W L Y RUNNING OUT ——————
GIVE ME TRUTH GIVE ME A WAY OUT (I GOT A BONE TO PICK) ——————
[align=center] SOMEBODY [I]SHOWED YOU ALL OF THE HORRORS YOU WEREN'T BORN WITH IT ——————
[align=center] [table] | | | [/table] PLOTS
 Take that half-finished oneshot that was supposed to be for 200 or 300 and finish it. Make that like, the intro. Will that part be 2000 words? maybe it's already like 900 or smth. But that's fine. It's their 500th post and a massive development for them. Go all out
 Derick comes knocking on the door in the middle of the night. Cat realizes who it is and sends Gav with Mo over to Molly's to wait for them
 Cat and Derick have their Confrontation, Cat yeets him
 I really should start this thing now in a google doc or smth
 That's gonna be the oneshot, no one's gonna be able to post icly in it
 THEN there's a private thread where Cat and Gav and Molly. are emotional lmao. Cat finally tells them everything and makes up with Molly, Gav is a Good Fucking Boyfriend, Cat's identity crisis starts
 Cat does an announcement about how they're leaving for a bit, picks some ppl to be in charge. will actually decide who at the time or at least closer
 Cat leaves to take Derick's body back to his family
 Stops by to talk to Susie, sort of makes up with her too and gets back on speaking terms with her
 Actually brings the body back to Susanna and the kids. they're obviously upset, Cat miiight stay for the funeral, or they might just leave
 They get back and ofc they're gonna wanna see Gav and Mo right away, but Molly insists that there's someone they have to see and no it cannot wait
 She introduces them to their father. They've got a lot of feelings, and it's all really stiff and awkward bc wtf he's alive what do they do with this information?
 They're the one that asks why he didn't come back. Molly was avoiding the question, and it may very well start a fight between Austin and Molly. Will Cat leave in the middle of it? probably
 They go home and see Gav and Mo. Vent to Gav and probably cry and just. try to process that just days before they killed the only father figure they've ever had and now their real father is back
 Try to talk to Austin again the next day? And introduce him to Gav and Mo unless Molly did that while they were away wow tea
 I'm gonna have to think on how Cat and Austin's relationship will develop bc idfk tbh. It def will be a complicated mess
 Don't forget that they're having a serious identity crisis. Honestly Austin showing up would make it worse
 THEN LOUIE SHOWS UP
 Possibly drunk out of his gourd, possibly sober. Addresses Cat as Scott, and that's the first time they publicly seem to. accept it from anyone? even if by then they've quietly asked their family to call them that. If anything they're relieved that he called him that, since it shows he's left Mourningstar behind and is making a conscious effort to do so
 OH YEAH THEY'RE GONNA HAVE SUBTLE SHIFTS Gav, Molly, Austin and Creed (and Louie when he gets there) would be asked to call them Scott instead of Cat, and they start introducing themself to strangers as Cat instead of Catalyst. Depending who it is and the tone, they won't be mad abt anyone else using Scott, though there are exceptions cough Silas cough.
 Won't be as sure of themself? Or know who they are? Or who they should be? They feel like they can't actually change due to the persona and role they've built for themself, but they aren't really happy being that person. But they don't have any idea how to be any other way. But they'd really like to be different. The buts could go on
 So not only is Cat trying to deal with having a dad, now they're trying to get their gd brother clean
 Austin trying to bond with Cat and Gav? please? talk to Noccy about this bc it'd be the most awkward gd thing
 Also. awkward reminiscing with Louie. Cat chokes on their drink twice in a row.
 oh god if Susie came looking for Louie for Susanna. I really should not. Seriously way too much is happening for that
 The stuff with Austin is going to be interesting. You fucking beT they're not gonna know how to handle it
 I think Louie's just. gonna be there. maybe he'll get a sub but it'll be on the side acc
 Austin MIGHT get a sub but I'll prob either post w him and Cat or w him and Molly
 I'm crying this'll prob carry them to 600 posts
This is also not converted,professional or exhaustive and focuses just on certain things. there's so much more
I HAD THIS FEELING THAT YOU'D BETRAY ME ——————
IF I GAVE TOO MUCH AND YOU TOOK TOO MUCH ——————
there's blood on the leaves / there's blood on the sands I ——————
FEEL HIS GRACE S L O W L Y RUNNING OUT ——————
GIVE ME TRUTH GIVE ME A WAY OUT (I GOT A BONE TO PICK) ——————
[align=center] SOMEBODY [I]SHOWED YOU ALL OF THE HORRORS YOU WEREN'T BORN WITH IT ——————
[align=center] [table] | | | [/table] INVENTORY
oh boy this'll be a fun one
I HAD THIS FEELING THAT YOU'D BETRAY ME ——————
IF I GAVE TOO MUCH AND YOU TOOK TOO MUCH ——————
there's blood on the leaves / there's blood on the sands I ——————
FEEL HIS GRACE S L O W L Y RUNNING OUT ——————
GIVE ME TRUTH GIVE ME A WAY OUT (I GOT A BONE TO PICK) ——————
[align=center] SOMEBODY [I]SHOWED YOU ALL OF THE HORRORS YOU WEREN'T BORN WITH IT ——————
[align=center] [table] | | | [/table] STRENGTHS
their main strength is being good looking
I HAD THIS FEELING THAT YOU'D BETRAY ME ——————
IF I GAVE TOO MUCH AND YOU TOOK TOO MUCH ——————
there's blood on the leaves / there's blood on the sands I ——————
FEEL HIS GRACE S L O W L Y RUNNING OUT ——————
GIVE ME TRUTH GIVE ME A WAY OUT (I GOT A BONE TO PICK) ——————
[align=center] SOMEBODY [I]SHOWED YOU ALL OF THE HORRORS YOU WEREN'T BORN WITH IT ——————
[align=center] [table] | | | [/table] WEAKNESSES
their main weakness is that they're the fucking worst
I HAD THIS FEELING THAT YOU'D BETRAY ME ——————
IF I GAVE TOO MUCH AND YOU TOOK TOO MUCH ——————
there's blood on the leaves / there's blood on the sands I ——————
FEEL HIS GRACE S L O W L Y RUNNING OUT ——————
GIVE ME TRUTH GIVE ME A WAY OUT (I GOT A BONE TO PICK) ——————
[align=center] SOMEBODY [I]SHOWED YOU ALL OF THE HORRORS YOU WEREN'T BORN WITH IT ——————
I HAD THIS FEELING THAT YOU'D BETRAY ME ——————
IF I GAVE TOO MUCH AND YOU TOOK TOO MUCH ——————
there's blood on the leaves / there's blood on the sands I ——————
FEEL HIS GRACE S L O W L Y RUNNING OUT ——————
GIVE ME TRUTH GIVE ME A WAY OUT (I GOT A BONE TO PICK) ——————
[align=center] SOMEBODY [I]SHOWED YOU ALL OF THE HORRORS YOU WEREN'T BORN WITH IT ——————
[align=center] [table] | | | [/table] WRITING
(10-05-2018, 04:01 AM)catalyst link Wrote: It wasn't so much the world that weighed heavily on their shoulders, but rather the idea that they were the one that would end it. Had already begun ending it. Sure, they had largely embraced their role (especially after Mourningstar), but could anyone truly look around them, at all the people trying to live their lives, and like the idea that they would ultimately be the one to destroy it all? Sometimes, yes, they took pleasure in that everyone who had wronged them would see their fingertips close around the sun, but what about people like their mother? She was annoying and overbearing sometimes, but she hadn't done anything wrong and they still loved her. And all these people here? For a brief moment, they'd been their subjects. They could have even been their friends.
(10-05-2018, 05:17 AM)catalyst link Wrote: [color=#0d0d0d]To be clear, they were aware how insane it sounded. A large part of them dismissed the idea, thought it was ridiculous just as anyone else would. But they knew that the lights in the hospital went out the moment they entered the world, and they came back on when they cried. A coincidence, most would say, but when you spent months getting worshiped by a cult that believed you would end the world, these things could go to your head.
They did believe in Fate, though. They believed they had a destiny, but in truth, if it wasn't to blacken the sun, what was it? Perhaps it would have been to lead this place, but this boy in front of them had snatched it away from them. (It's to destroy him. Take back what's rightfully yours and take your revenge on everyone that would stand in your way. Make him grovel for forgiveness.)
He's coming closer, within reach. They could grab him, if they were quick enough - which considering their diminished physical state, they weren't - and force him to release them. Or they could take the water. Their eyes fixed on it, and their tongue raked across their chapped lips. They tilted their head to the side, chains clinking as they did, showing the earring in their cartilage. [color=black]"If you did a thorough enough search you'd know about the others." Even if they'd been unconscious for it, it didn't take a genius to wake up without their weapons and realize someone had searched them. They wrinkled their nose just thinking about it; how positively invasive. The only bright side they could see was that it probably wasn't as bad as it could have been.
(10-07-2018, 06:57 AM)catalyst link Wrote: Catalyst didn't really like fights. Correction: they didn't like fights on other people's terms. Some people didn't like to throw the first punch, as if not hitting first gave them some moral high ground. But with Cat, there were some very specific circumstances in which he was okay with others making the first move, usually with him challenging them to do so. But if he got to start it? Well, that was a different story.
Maybe it was about control, but he didn't think that was it. There was a sort of intimacy in fights, not like that between lovers; it was a different kind of heat, but a heat all the same. The touches of lovers were soft and tender, backed by kindness. The touches of brawlers were harsh and desperate, backed by hatred. Well, lovers weren't always tender and you could have all sorts of reasons for picking a fight. Catalyst had issued a challenge to the people of the Badlands, and it hadn't been because they hated them, no, it was to assert themself.
Now look at them.
(10-09-2018, 10:54 PM)catalyst link Wrote: [color=#0d0d0d]Surely believing in such a nihilistic outlook would lead to an empty life, surely someone that thought nothing they did mattered would do nothing with their lives. Well, they could see how the people that were the most fugged in the head would see it as a freeing realization, would tell them that no matter how awful they were, there would be no consequences. For Catalyst, believing in fate meant that the pain they and everyone else endured wasn't for no reason, that the things they had done to survive were all part of the plan. When you thought you were responsible for the end of the world, what other comfort could you take but the comfort that it wasn't really your responsibility?
(10-16-2018, 02:49 AM)catalyst link Wrote: [color=#0d0d0d]On a certain level, they did enjoy the blood pumping through their veins, the anticipation of pain (be it theirs or someone else's), the uncertainty of whether you'd make it out okay. Who would come out on top? Catalyst was confident enough in their abilities, but there'd been just as many nights with blood streaming from their nose and mouth, limping away and muttering curses as there had been where they came out on top. Hell, sometimes the most brutal fights ended with both.
[color=black]"It's interesting for the twist." They replied, settling back against the wall. "And it doesn't always kill you. Sometimes it just makes you really sick." They'd been part of a cult, and while poisonings had been infrequent, they distinctly remembered standing over someone while she vomited until there was nothing but blood and bile; offering no comfort or sympathy, just making sure that she knew this was because of them, because of her disbelief in them.
(Ha. They didn't even believe in them. Not really.)
(12-05-2018, 01:22 AM)catalyst link Wrote: Some might say that the quest that Catalyst had embarked on was a noble one. With Tydeus apparently gone in a forceful manner, they had decided to go and rescue him. Other people might say that it was a foolish undertaking, saving the man that had taken their power, their freedom, making them a prisoner and a slave. Catalyst would disagree that it was noble; they weren't doing it out of the goodness of their heart, if anything they were more interested in condemning Tyd to a different fate - one where they could have their revenge.
But with Catalyst, such explanations could never be so simple. They couldn't admit that the problem they had was not that Tyd's life was hellish, but rather they didn't want anyone else to make it so. They wouldn't even admit that to themself; no, what they'd admit to themself was that they were following orders. Their mistress had bid them go after him, and so they did.
(12-30-2018, 12:04 AM)catalyst link Wrote: [color=#0d0d0d]Cat could empathize with Sheo on some level in regards to the touch thing; they hated it when other people touched them without their permission, in any sort of way. It was a large part of why they'd been so furious with Tydeus for knocking them out and taking them prisoner, and for J knocking them out and painting them green (they dubbed themself fully paint free a few days ago). Smaller gestures, a brush against their arm for instance, were easier to cope with. Accidents, or instances that were small enough they could believe it was unintentional.
(Hmm, perhaps they needed a bodyguard to watch their back, or at least a helmet. No, that would look terrible and send the wrong message.)
(12-31-2018, 04:43 AM)catalyst link Wrote: [color=#0d0d0d][color=black]"We've got a new person in our ranks... he's also called Cat. So. I guess if you hurl any insults at 'Cat' I'll assume it's him and not me." They smiled; it was a joke, meant to bring ease to their audience. Maybe even get a chuckle.
"When I took over, I talked to you a little bit about the state the world is in. It's not doing good. It's doing quite badly, actually. It's in ruins, humanity possesses but a fraction of the number it once had, a mere taste of the power and resources once under its control." They couldn't help but pace back and forward as they spoke, making small gestures to emphasize how little was left of what once was.
"We live in a brutal, unforgiving world. It allows for two kinds of people: the type that will roll over and accept the beating that is delivered unto them, and those that are doing the beating." They paused here, another smile making its way onto their lips. "Which are you?" They got a few responses, some Badlanders stayed silent or even edged back (Sheo, they noticed, was one of the ones that seemed uncomfortable. Interesting, considering his historic bloodlust). Others were timidly proclaiming themselves to be of the latter group, such as Gabe, and some of the other teens threw out their preferred means of carrying out the beating. Lake liked using her sticks, Willow wanted to burn things. Many Badlanders proudly announced that they were the latter, like Russel. He seemed almost amused by the question.
"That's what I fugging thought!" Their voice rose and with it their arms - a sign of pride and triumph. "So here's what I'm thinking. We want people like us, yeah? Everyone else can go to hell. We take what we want and what we need, people can join us, they can get out of the way or get mowed down." They had no time for people that were unwilling to do what it would take to survive in this new, broken world. It truly was kill or be killed.
"So if they're not one of us, I don't much care what you do to them. Take their shite, kill them, whatever. If they are... Not so much. You guys can still fight each other, I know what kind of personalities we got here," another jest, though it was true, "there's just one rule for that. You gotta challenge the person you wanna fight, and they gotta agree to it. Basically you both gotta be down to throw down. That's pretty much it, but don't kill each other too much. Or at all, preferably." Was this rule partially inspired by what Tydues and J had both done to them? Noo, of course not.
(12-31-2018, 05:50 AM)catalyst link Wrote: [color=black]"If you don't want help, would you like us to speed up the inevitable?" They inquired, blinking as a familiar name fell from the other's lips. Another Cat. Hmm. They crossed their arms, listening to the rants they went on to the others. Then... "Your mom." A small, almost imperceptible sigh escaped their lips as their optics lifted skyward for a moment.
Then it came crashing back down on this new Cat. "How presumptuous of you to assume I have a mother, and that I didn't just appear fully formed with a vengeance." Their cult days may be over, but some part of them still liked building their own myth. That was something that might never change.
(01-13-2019, 07:02 AM)catalyst link Wrote: warning for a joke about cutting anyone that touches them
Cat had debated whether or not to join the little training session. They weren't so arrogant to think that they didn't need the practice, but they were lazy enough to not feel especially inclined to abandon their spot on the roof from where they'd been watching the assembly. Finally they descended the ladder and walked over, arms crossed over their chest. [color=black]"I'm not a pansy." They said with mock indignancy. "If I was a flower, I'd be a rose. I look pretty but if you touch me I'll cut you." At Michael's request that they disarm themself, they heaved a great sigh and started removing the various knives and daggers kept on their person, piling them up separately from Mike's.
(01-29-2019, 06:21 AM)catalyst link Wrote: There were very few people they cared about. But then, there were very few people that cared about them. Why would they worry over someone's well-being when they wouldn't do the same for them? And why would anyone want to worry over them anyway? It was a bit different when they were protecting their fellow Badlanders; they couldn't honestly say that it was for the right reason. It was a means of gathering loyalty and perhaps a bit of fear, too. It was better to be on Cat's side, where they would protect you, than be against them, where they wouldn't hold back.
But I digress.
One of the few people that Cat did honestly care about, and certainly the only one presently in their life, was their mother, Molly. Allowing any harm to come to her was unthinkable, let alone inflicting that harm themself. When they were younger, when those kids followed them home, they'd been scared for themself, but even more prominently, they'd been scared for her. So when the coast was clear and they ran away, it had been for her sake more than anyone else's. A nine year old's best attempt at protecting all that they had.
(02-01-2019, 02:25 AM)catalyst link Wrote: [color=#0d0d0d]//more tws for death and murder
Their father left when they were three. They still remembered when he went out the door, their mother pleading with him to stay. She told them later that he left because he was sick, that he was going to find treatment and come back when he was better. She said that he didn't want them to watch him wither away and die. They figured that he never was able to get treatment, seeing as he never came home.
Cataylst wasn't the one that buried the body. They might be the one to make it so a burial was necessary, but there was always someone else, someone lower in the pecking order that was given the job. A cultist, a worm, the most they had to do was help move the bodies or show someone else where to do it. You wouldn't make a god do manual labor, would you? You wouldn't expect the boss to busy themself with slavework?
Granted, sometimes digging a person's final resting place could be a personal task that some might not want to give up so easily, especially if they'd had a bond with the deceased.
(02-02-2019, 06:31 AM)catalyst link Wrote: [color=#0d0d0d]Molly's arrival here changed things. They were still figuring out the extent of the things that her appearance changed, since they were still trying to figure out how to be around her. You could argue that the timing of their trip to Flintlock had been no coincidence, a chance for them to think clearly about everything and figure out what they were going to do. They weren't going to toss her out, no, that was unthinkable. They wanted her in their life, they hadn't run away from her all those years ago because she'd been cruel or because of anything she had done, but rather, they feared that their presence there, after they'd pissed off every kid in the neighborhood, would mean for her. They had already known kids could be cruel, though they'd only truly learn how violent they could be after, when they joined the Young Rogues.
Maybe that's where they started changing, where whatever softness they had possessed before was chipped away, leaving jagged edges. It would only get worse after they left the Young Rogues, though. Mourningstar is where they really lost their humanity. At least, most of it. Shreds of it still existed, maybe twisted and no longer pure and innocent, but there was still something human within them, something they weren't keen on admitting. Wanting to make sure that Tydeus was okay, even though he had them imprisoned. The desire to see Gabe become strong enough to protect himself and those he loved. Their thoughtless protectiveness of Paige. The boiling fury that Jeremy had dared lay a hand on their mother. If you looked, the evidence was there, though they would deny it all day long.
Compassion didn't totally rule them, though. Look what they had done to Sheogorath; they might have freed him from the bandits and given him a chance to prove his loyalty but all it was was strategy. They might not have wanted to do what they did to him, but no one would believe that because they hadn't held back in the least. And when it came time to punish Mike, whatever they did hold back was strategy. They didn't want their (then unofficial) Enforcer too banged up to be useful. Besides, Mike was a smart man, he'd get the point without them having to literally hammer it in.
Had they come back with their head any clearer in regards to their mother? Maybe a little, but as they marched through the territory, dodging Badlanders that wanted to know how their meeting with Hayley had gone, all they could really think in relation to Molly was that they wanted to see her again. They wanted to make sure that nothing had happened to her while they were away. Maybe even some part of them wanted to make sure they hadn't dreamed the whole thing, that she was really here.
And there she was, up on the patio of their temporarily shared house with... Michael. Interesting. Their eyes narrowed just a bit, hearing her describe their affinity for fashion and Mike's response. [color=black]"Fat lot of good it did me." They called, squinting up at the pair. "If Hell's freezing, Flintlock is undoubtedly Hell." Their gaze flicked over to Mike. "Though I suppose a good Catholic boy would know more about that than me, eh? Is it boiling or freezing? I'd like to -" They halted mid sentence, their joke about wanting to know what they had to look forward to dying on their lips when they remembered their mother. She wouldn't appreciate it, and come to think of it, they didn't think Mike really would either. "Nevermind, I'll be up there in a second." Without waiting for a response from either of them, they ducked inside, taking the stairs two at a time until they were out on the balcony.
(02-03-2019, 11:59 PM)catalyst link Wrote: //cw for being anti-religion?
//also me? roleplaying Molly in this post? more likely than you think
Telling her how they had come by the name Catalyst would mean telling her about Mourningstar, telling her about Derick. They weren't ready for that, weren't ready for her to know. They weren't sure if they'd ever be ready for that. They weren't sure they were ashamed, exactly, but maybe they were. It was a chapter of their life they wanted to leave behind, but even if they were to revisit, they were pretty sure Molly was the last person they'd want to know about it.
For the briefest second, the corner of their mouth twitched up in a brief smirk when Mike swore. They supposed they could end up in any number of the nine circles, though the ninth itself wasn't one they thought was likely. They tried to keep to their word, betrayals weren't ever purposeful. But did that mean they hadn't left people feeling betrayed? Were the small betrayals enough to land you in the ninth circle? Surely such a horrible place was reserved for the worst of the worst, but then, when you considered all the other sins they had definitely committed, did it really matter?
They were glad they didn't believe in this, that thoughts of where their soul might go when they died did not plague their sleep. They couldn't imagine why sinners would cling to it, well, they understood why the ones looking for salvation would. But the ones that were certain in their destination, certain that there was no saving them? Why would you waste time and energy on religiousness then? Well, Catalyst was in religious company now, they wouldn't deign to share their iconoclastic thoughts.
Cat narrowed their eyes at Michael and touched a hand to their incoming beard. "You look like your father with that." Molly said nostalgically, as if Mike's comment hadn't been bad enough. A tiny growl started and died in the back of their throat.
[color=black]"I'll take tea in a minute, Ma, I gotta get rid of this." They weren't really a fan of the whole facial hair thing, and everyone commenting on it didn't really make them want to keep growing it out. Not being able to shave on their trip to Flintlock had been bad enough, but Gavril, Mike, Molly, even Gabe, all were a pile of cherries on top of it.
Molly sighed. "Well get Michael a towel, would you?" Cat rolled their eyes as they broke away from her, stepping back inside. Yeah, they'd get Mike a towel, but they weren't promising to bring it quickly. Once Cat had disappeared back into the house, Molly looked back at Mike. "I guess the old people party is over, huh?"
(02-08-2019, 06:04 PM)catlayst link Wrote: [color=#0d0d0d]In Cat's very limited experience, these things never ended well. How could they? Even perfect romances were beset by tragedy, just look at their own parents; high school sweethearts that managed to make everything work only for Austin to leave because of a debilitating illness. They had very few memories of their father, and most weren't really reflective of the love he had for his wife. Heh. Each tragedy had its own mini tragedies that accompanied it.
But what examples did they have? Susanna and Derick never looked at each other with any spark of romance in their eyes, though on the outside it seemed as if they got on well. They didn't fight, they functioned well together, but whatever little love they shared when Derick took them in faded more and more over the years that followed. And, whatever Cat had with Susie (not the same as Susanna, of course) had ended worse than anything else, shy of perhaps a story like their parents'. At first it had seemed good, but they realized all too quickly that it wasn't.
But that's the thing, wasn't it? In the moment it felt good. That's why when strangers drew them in, they didn't run away. They let it happen, because in the moment it felt good, they could forget everything else and just enjoy this faux connection. Maybe that's why they pushed him against the wall and kissed him so hard - they just wanted to forget everything for a minute and pretend.
(02-08-2019, 01:28 AM)catalyst link Wrote: [color=#0d0d0d]//tw for violence and gore
They were evil. They did evil things. Their streets were soaked in blood, and if you weren't willing you have yours mixed in with all the rest, you should stay far, far away from the place known as the Badlands. Those rumors and more were floating around, surely getting more graphic with each retelling. Were they true? Well, some of them were based on truth, there were monsters that prowled the city wearing the masks of humans, but being able to identify which ones would slit your throat and which ones would hold your hand was damn near impossible.
And they liked it that way. They liked the idea that their name might be the one that mothers told their children to get them to behave. "If you don't hush up, Catalyst will come take you to the Badlands." Was the Badlands really that terrible of a place to grow up? Well, there were worse places, places where kids would suffer at the hands of those that were supposed to protect them, but here they were safe-ish. Taught to defend themselves from the moment they showed that they were ready, and until they could do it themselves they were protected by the more experienced fighters. And if those were the stories you heard, the ones of the ruthless protectors, well, if you didn't mind their methods, why not try and get that?
(02-08-2019, 02:09 AM)catalyst link Wrote: [color=#0d0d0d]People looking at Catalyst probably didn't think that they were broken. At least, not in the present day. They'd think there was something twisted, something bent, something not quite right. They were off, somehow, in a way that a normal, whole person wasn't. Some might think that they had been broken at one point, and had healed back badly, in all the wrong ways, never to truly be what they once were. (And they'd be right.)
Whatever kindness and empathy they had possessed twelve, thirteen years ago, it was just about gone. Burned away by the cruelty of others and cut off by Catalyst themself as they were forced to become cruel as well. You couldn't be the figurehead of a cult if you felt bad for the people your cult hurt, after all. Even now, they weren't hurrying to reattach the amputated parts of their personality, because their ruthlessness was still necessary. Even if they did want to renounce Catalyst, go back to just being Scott Mathew Darrow, how could they? Willing the scars to fully heal as smooth as before didn't mean they would.
But despite all of that, they were okay. Or as okay as they were going to get. They had everything they could want, didn't they? Their mother was here, they had power and a community and a purpose. Granted, it might be nice to actually have a bond with some of their fellow Badlanders, but they'd gone their whole life without having close connections to people. As much as they wanted to have real friends, they weren't sure they'd know how to be a friend, or how to simply have them. It was something they'd been denied their whole life, with the exception of Susie, so for as much as they yearned for companionship, they didn't know what they'd do if they actually had it.
I HAD THIS FEELING THAT YOU'D BETRAY ME ——————
IF I GAVE TOO MUCH AND YOU TOOK TOO MUCH ——————
there's blood on the leaves / there's blood on the sands I ——————
FEEL HIS GRACE S L O W L Y RUNNING OUT ——————
GIVE ME TRUTH GIVE ME A WAY OUT (I GOT A BONE TO PICK) ——————
[align=center] SOMEBODY [I]SHOWED YOU ALL OF THE HORRORS YOU WEREN'T BORN WITH IT ——————
[align=center] [table] | | | [/table] QUOTES
I'm impulsively adding this
this section is for all the things that other ppl/chars have said about Cat that needs to be saved for whatever reason. no context.
I HAD THIS FEELING THAT YOU'D BETRAY ME ——————
IF I GAVE TOO MUCH AND YOU TOOK TOO MUCH ——————
there's blood on the leaves / there's blood on the sands I ——————
FEEL HIS GRACE S L O W L Y RUNNING OUT ——————
GIVE ME TRUTH GIVE ME A WAY OUT (I GOT A BONE TO PICK) ——————
[align=center] SOMEBODY [I]SHOWED YOU ALL OF THE HORRORS YOU WEREN'T BORN WITH IT ——————
[align=center] [table] | | | [/table] LINKS
[table] â€â€Ã¢â‚¬â€ Roleplayer
â€â€Ã¢â‚¬â€ Pinterest
â€â€Ã¢â‚¬â€ First ooc post
â€â€Ã¢â‚¬â€ First ic post / takeover
â€â€Ã¢â‚¬â€ Breezeblocks / meeting Tyd
â€â€Ã¢â‚¬â€ First plotting thread
â€â€Ã¢â‚¬â€ Zombie apocalypse AU
â€â€Ã¢â‚¬â€ Task
â€â€Ã¢â‚¬â€ Release / leaving
â€â€Ã¢â‚¬â€ Rejoining the Badlands
â€â€Ã¢â‚¬â€ Revisiting the warehouse
â€â€Ã¢â‚¬â€ Painted green
â€â€Ã¢â‚¬â€ Christmas party
â€â€Ã¢â‚¬â€ Taking over the Badlands
â€â€Ã¢â‚¬â€ Confronting Jeremy
â€â€Ã¢â‚¬â€ Dec 30 meeting
â€â€Ã¢â‚¬â€ Private thread with Gabe
â€â€Ã¢â‚¬â€ Dramatic reading
â€â€Ã¢â‚¬â€ Sheo's return
â€â€Ã¢â‚¬â€ 100th post oneshot
â€â€Ã¢â‚¬â€ Sheo's test
â€â€Ã¢â‚¬â€ Heartchart v.1
â€â€Ã¢â‚¬â€ Attack on Gabe
â€â€Ã¢â‚¬â€ Jan 06 meeting
â€â€Ã¢â‚¬â€ Sheo's punishment
â€â€Ã¢â‚¬â€ Nathaniel encounter
â€â€Ã¢â‚¬â€ Gabe confrontation
â€â€Ã¢â‚¬â€ Mike's punishment
â€â€Ã¢â‚¬â€ Meeting Paige
â€â€Ã¢â‚¬â€ Jan 20 meeting
â€â€Ã¢â‚¬â€ Attack on Paige
â€â€Ã¢â‚¬â€ Attack on Lake
â€â€Ã¢â‚¬â€ Reuniting with Molly
â€â€Ã¢â‚¬â€ Meeting Mord
â€â€Ã¢â‚¬â€ Visit to Flintlock
â€â€Ã¢â‚¬â€ Jan 27 meeting
â€â€Ã¢â‚¬â€ Meeting Gavril
â€â€Ã¢â‚¬â€ Vasco's joining
â€â€Ã¢â‚¬â€ Sade's death
â€â€Ã¢â‚¬â€ Thread with Molly and Mike
â€â€Ã¢â‚¬â€ Thread with Gabe
â€â€Ã¢â‚¬â€ Thread I with Gav
â€â€Ã¢â‚¬â€ Jeremy's punishment pt. 1
â€â€Ã¢â‚¬â€ 200th post oneshot
â€â€Ã¢â‚¬â€ forty-five
â€â€Ã¢â‚¬â€ forty-six
â€â€Ã¢â‚¬â€ forty-seven
â€â€Ã¢â‚¬â€ forty-eight
â€â€Ã¢â‚¬â€ forty-nine
â€â€Ã¢â‚¬â€ fifty
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| [/table]
I HAD THIS FEELING THAT YOU'D BETRAY ME ——————
IF I GAVE TOO MUCH AND YOU TOOK TOO MUCH ——————
there's blood on the leaves / there's blood on the sands I ——————
FEEL HIS GRACE S L O W L Y RUNNING OUT ——————
GIVE ME TRUTH GIVE ME A WAY OUT (I GOT A BONE TO PICK) ——————
[align=center] SOMEBODY [I]SHOWED YOU ALL OF THE HORRORS YOU WEREN'T BORN WITH IT ——————
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