I'M MEANER THAN MY DEMONS | private

[B-1984]

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His paws were shaking, he never had wanted to do that nor had he ever dreamt of it. He was free from Hell itself as he greedily swallowed the fresh air around him touching the grass underneath his paws with talons eagerly tugging at each blade. His whole body shook like an earthquake, his nose pressed to the grass underneath him, the silence being interrupted by heavy breathing trying to forget the horrible things that the humans had done to him. The screeches of several animals still ringing in his ears almost as if he was still in that cell being prodded with a stick with some electric mechanism and how he'd howl in pain growing angrier at the two legged beings. He rose to his feet glancing around with his hackles raised but, he didn't seem to take another glance at the land before his volcanic gaze locked onto a smaller form; a hyena with an odd coloring to him. B-1984 closed his four eyes for a moment trying not to remember all those horrible things yet his heart ached inside of his chest and he just wanted to grip his chest with his paws but he couldn't. He had to be strong for the both of them as he shakily walked over to the hyena both ears angled forward with his beautiful plumage somewhat ruffled. He took a moment to adjust his wings and rest them at his sides only to grimace at the sight of them, they had been clipped by the White Jackets and he couldn't fly until the feathers grew back in their place. His volcanic gaze was unwavering as he stared at the form of the hyena unable to utter a single word, he felt like the words were stuck in his throat. He drew closer to the smaller life form using his muzzle to nudge the cheek of the hyena before he let out a soft whimper.

Had he made another mistake? Maybe he shouldn't have. . . No, it was going to be alright. Both of them were free from their cage and cell, they didn't have to go through anymore pain. No more of it. He would make sure that as his gaze darkened slightly, he exhaled slowly letting out a few wisps of shadows escape his mouth and nostrils. He walked toward one of the trees or what was left of it, he took the time to sniff it as his pupilless gaze surveyed the area for another time. He clambered on top of the remains of the tree with his talons digging into the bark would he then sit up a bit trying to see if there was anything else up ahead. A mountain range. The both of them could go there and be safe from the White Jackets. Maybe they could even do things that B-1984 had always said they would do, he had heard brief words here and there from the two legged beings knowing and recognizing a few things. He looked down at the tree with a soft sniff "T-Tree. . ." He rumbled starting to tear at some of the bark with his large talons, he turned to blink at the hyena, he glanced down at the ground for a moment only to finally utter "J-8320. . ." He hopped off the tree slowly walking in the direction of the hyena letting out another noise that resembled an avian.

#pyresfancy

[B-1984]

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It was selfish really, how J-8320 had wanted to forget so badly yet here he was deciding to remember everything for the sake of both of them. Didn't J-8320 know how much he cared? Did the hyena even care? But, he thought for a moment realizing that if it hadn't been done then he would have appeared to be the selfish one wanting to drag the other into a form of traumatic depression although, they would have had each other. Even if B-1984 wanted so badly to forget all that had occurred to them and what the White Jackets had did to them, he refuses to forget himself or J-8320 or what had been anyways. Some of the memories he cherished whilst others made him want to claw his ears off, the only good memories consisted of his time being with J-8320 and everything else was just static noises and screeching animals. He hated the White Jackets with a passion yet he didn't know where they were anymore, they were probably safe somewhere and he dreaded the thought of those horrid two legged beings even being safe. He dreaded it and he wanted to make them all burn, he wanted to make all of them pay. He would have enjoyed tearing into them with his talons but there was no one but him and J-8320. The thought of it just being him and J-8320 was comforting in a way though it was bone chilling all the same since they didn't know where they were and he was just relying on instinct or whatever he had left of. These thoughts were interrupted by a greeting spoken by a familiar voice that made his insides feel like goo, his tufted ears angled forward as his volcanic gaze locked onto vibrant green pools that belonged to J-8320.

"J-8320. What?"

The question itself made his heart break reminding him that J-8320 didn't recall anything of the White Jackets or the laboratory where they held several expermintations. It hurt even more seeing the confusion and the sudden excitement, he turned his gaze away angry at the other. Selfish. So selfish. He wanted to tell him so many nasty things but, he refrained seeing as the only companion he had was J-8320. This was a new start for the hyena, he had to realize that and take it to heart yet it only hurt knowing that their possible bond had been thrown away. He couldn't call him J-8320 anymore, no, he had to have a real name. The only thing that came to his mind was colors as he stared at J-8320 though his pupilless gaze searched around as if hoping for a sign from whatever Gods existed. He felt something under his talons and noticed that it was a name tag that a White Jacket wore, it was stained with blood but he noticed a J at the beginning of the name. He stared for a few moments only to glance over at J-8320 "I. . . meant. . . John." He rose once more staring down at the other still subtly angry even if "subtly" wasn't even the beginning of it "Get up, J-John." B-1984 started to wonder how much J-83 - no, how much John had forgotten but, he would soon see what was forgotten if the other would listen. It hurt all over; his mind, his body, and his heart. B-1984 let out a soft breath starting to draw close using his nose to try nudging John upwards.

B-1984. B-1984. B-1984.

It hurt too much as of right now to be called what the old J-8320 had called him back when they were six months or so. It made his whole self ache but he ignored it all as he would then point in the direction of the mountain range "We. . . Go. . . There," He stated in a monotone voice not seeing the purpose of lacing his words with any form of emotion. Wouldn't he have to introduce himself to the newly named John? B-1984 didn't seem like the appropriate name but, he didn't want John calling him that forsaken name. The name that reminded him of all that he had missed, all that he had fucked up, all that he could have done but didn't do it in time. "You were asleep for quite a while, John. . ." He mumbled at last trying to make it seem like he was there the whole time and they were friends not strangers. He wished that the humans had taken his ability to feel emotionally then he wouldn't have to suffer so much with this, he was utterly miserable yet he was too stubborn to show any of it. He'd just have to fall out of love with John, that was his only solution. If only it were more easy said than done. 'You're being selfish, B-1984.' He told himself as he shook his head, a frown lacing his lips. He didn't save John in time.

He had failed J-8320.

#pyresfancy

[B-1984]

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The behaviour that J-8320 had was oddly familiar reminding him of the time when they had been innocent puppies without much knowledge of what was going on around them or let alone be aware of what was waiting for them. The Hell that both of them would go through, what he would go through that would stain the innocence of a child. How it would scar him, traumatize him, and make him unable to forget such events that would lurk in the shadows of his own mind where he could have found comfort in but no, everything about himself would bring discomfort. How he would want to claw off his own ears and around his mouth but, there was someone who stopped him from doing all of that. He could have ended it all there in that Hell of his in both in his mind and surroundings but, J-8320 made him rethink his decisions because B-1984 hadn't felt this horribly warm sensation in his chest and entire body despite all the injections, and the pain. He didn't know what it was called though it was by far the best feeling that he had ever felt that speaking to the smaller male made him feel all gooey and warm. When he was in his cell, his thoughts seemed to be filled to the brim with thoughts of J-8320 and he would always place his talons on his chest to try feeling the way his heart would beat.

Love.

When the other's nose touched his paw, he almost wanted to leave it there though he moved it without much of a second thought as he answered "No, I'm. . ." He didn't want to hear that name but if he wanted to forget the laboratory then he would have to adopt this name given him to his "lost" friend "Brix." He took a deep breath soon speaking once again when the hyena asked who John was "You are John." He probably shouldn't be visibly angry with the hyena who was clueless, of course, since he had just woke up with no memories whatsoever. The memories that he. . . No, he couldn't think of it right now or he'd be even angrier at himself than John. He had so much to teach John especially since he was like an infant and Brix was basically babysitting him, he sighed quietly to himself just watching the other's movements through all four of his eyes. He was surprised that the hyena wasn't even stumbling backwards at the sight of such an unstable beast such as himself, hell, if Brix were to see himself for the first time then he certainly wouldn't hanging around for such a long time.

He seemed to be confused over what his objective was and after years of several experiments that involved mazes or puzzles or staying on the objective; always on the objective. His talons clicked against the smooth rock underneath him as he tried to explain to John but even he didn't know what most of the things out here were called "You and me are going to. . . Those jagged. . . Towers," He knew the name of some human buildings but everything else was foreign to him "We will be safe there, J-John." He nodded towards the mountains only to look at the hyena once more watching him "Yes. . . Asleep," He rumbled feeling the aching in his chest hurting even more though he spoke a few more words "Let's go, John." There was no,time to waste. What if there were more White Jackets that weren't dead? The thought of it made his whole body shake briefly and the feathers on his head rose slightly in a form of hostility.

#pyresfancy