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okay but like camber's stepdad almost like killed him because he was gripping his neck with a iron tight hold and camber thought he was going to die and he's just hella anxious and skittish around everyone, especially older guys, and he only trusts blake after that

he wasn't able to defend himself against his stepdad and he was helpless and couldn't save himself

OMG YES
okay so his stepdad has a gun and it'd be a lie to say he hadn't threatened camber with it, anyways what if when he sees that he like grabs the gun and shakily points it and kills him and panics and runs

CAMBER IS THANKFUL SOMEONE CARES
but he is so unsure of himself and others and is living in a constant state of fear whenever he goes back home because he can't stay at blake's forever but the cycle of abuse continues and can't help but wish for death
and each time he finds himself at blake's in his arms, he's more nervous and scared and in pain and covered in bruise and he doesn't know what to do because he can't escape his stepdad's grip and just there is probs an incident when he is hurt to the extent where he can't even move my poor son

good she is supportive even after she was mean at least things have changed
reminds me of skam when isak's mom accepted him for being gay

camber is full of angst and i didn't mean for it to escalate to this but it did and whoops
but he is aa sad boy who loves blake a lot


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rip me i take this road every single goddamn fucking day
like the back way is gonna be so backed up and so much traffic
hopefully it gets fixed soon and it won't be like this more than two days


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wheezes i can't stop imagining them just cuddling one night bc they just needed each other's warm embrace and benji tells aj he doesn't deserve him, asks him how he could love him after all the shit he did to him, and aj cups his face and just gives him his signature warm smile, but it's more affectionate, just a little bit sad, and aj tells him that he believes in second chances and that benji's proved himself already, that aj's forgiven him because benji deserved it, that benji deserves love and i'm just [i][b]more wheezing


[align=center][div style="margin-bottom: 5px; margin-top: 3px; word-spacing: 2px; letter-spacing: 0.5px; font-family: verdana; font-size: 8pt;"]will probs be kinda slow to reply  ⸺  [ dump ]
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[b]wheezing intensifies benji can never forgive himself for the hell he put aj through and how he didn't deserve that and benji doesn't want to lose aj ever but is scared. he jjust is nervous of it all and he can't even think straight because he's so worried all the time about losing the one person he truly cares about. and he doesn't believe he deserves that second chance but he is relieved to hear aj say that even if he doesn't believe he deserves love and he gives him a sad smile and nods slowly and trying to prevent himself from crying [i][b]cries because these two


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DID SOMEONE SAY ISAK

my baby
i love skam so much
i more people i knew watched it

camber reminds me of my dog
bc she won't go around men either

blake wasn't really like that but he certainly has trust issues w/ everyone in general

tbh if blake ever meets his stepdad, externally he would be v polite too make sure that he didn't leave his stepdad with a reason to abuse camber further
but internally he would be praying to god that someway this man would die bc he can't help camber enough in his opinion
but blake is 18 so maybe he convinces his mom to let him move out and lets camber stay with him
or if he doesn't do that then maybe he just lets camber sleep on his couch a lot or something

I LOVE IT
so he shoots him and he's so scared that he just killed a man and blake's like "it's okay, you're a good person, he deserved it, come with me, just breathe"
and he doesn't let him drive bc camber's so shaky still
side note: i feel like blake owns a red convertible

at first she was v much like "you're going to Hell, that is against god, I can't support this" but then she realized how much worse she was making his depression, and once she worked at vogue, she realized that being gay was v normal, so instead she became v liberal and now she's like "aww camber"
blake used to not trust ANYONE especially his mom w/ things
but now he tells her p much everything

i just meant blake won't be angsty about being attracted to camber
and he won't be all like "camber? never heard of him" any time someone mentions him
but he'll probably be quiet about their relationship anyway
he just won't push away loving camber as much as i initially thought he would, but he still will at the beginning


blake would be so mad if camber died
he's always like "i love you and i'll forgive you for everything and anything but killing yourself. do you fucking understand? you are beautiful. i love you. and i am going to figure out how to keep you safe."
blake is super frustrated w/ camber's situation
he's honestly so mad but he thinks it would be worse for him to be in foster care and he didn't think he could really just run away with him so he knows camber feels trapped and he feels trapped with him
all he wants for christmas is for camber to be happy and safe and the worst feeling in the world to him is dropping him back off at his house and knowing that he was to go back to that hell and not knowing what he can do about it







[div style="background=transparent; borderwidth=0px; bordercolor=; width: 300px; font-size: 8pt; line-height: 125%; text-align: justify; font-family: verdana; color: black"]・゚✧ and there we were caught in space and time. for a moment i thought i could be yours, you could be mine.
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ISAK IS MY PRESH SON AND SO IS EVEN
I CRIED SO MUCH IN THAAT ONE EPISODE
THE ONE WHERE EVEN SENDS THAT TEXT
AND ISAK GOES TO HIM TO HELP HIM AND I CRY

he was probably even nervous around blake
at least at first but it changes to him only trusting blake

like blake coming over to check on camber but his stepdad opens the door and yeah
camber probably just hiding out in his room because he doesn't want anything bad to happen
but even locking himself in his room doesn't protect him from the wrath of his stepdad
please, camber would be so thankful if he somehow was able to escape and live with blake away from the abuse and torment of his stepdad where he wouldn't have to fear for his life every second of the day

AHHH CAMBER JUST FREAKING OUT
like he just can't move and then he runs and he doesn't think that blake would help him because he killed someone
honestly he can't stop shaking and crying and just doesn't know what to do
yes i support that hc

good good i first hated his mom and now i like his mom and camber will come to also like blake's mom but is still v unsure because his own mother let his stepdad abuse him without remorse so he def didn't trust her at first even tho she never wronged him
camber wishes his relationship with his mom was like blake's with his mom

yeah yeah, camber would also be super hush hush about it
but he def pushed away the thought of loving blake at first because he was scared of his feelings
and later he didn't ppush them away and accepted it fully because he is in love

camber is scared of his situation
and he is forever nervous that blake will get sick of dealing with his problems and leave him but his words fill him with the smallest sliver of hope and he just nods slowly
honestly he feels as if he is trapped in a cell with no windows or doors and it's becoming smaller and smaller and he's suffocating and there's no escape and that he'll probably die by his stepdad's hands when he doesn't let go even when camber is gasping for breath and ends up strangling him
whenever he has to go back to his house he just starts shaking because he wants to stay with blake because he feels some small portion of safety when he is with blake and having to go back in that house he doesn't want to


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cracks knucles alright

so benji ran away you know? not really but like disappeared for a while and aj happened to like find him when aj was out on a lake that was frozen solid (or so he thought) and the ice cracks beneath him and he is like stuck underneath the ice andaj fucking breaks his own hand to save benji. and benji is hypothermic from being stuck in the frigid water and aj is trying to keep him warm and warm him up and help him and benji's fingers are probably blue and frostbitten as well as his ips and he's just shivering and just in and out of consciousness and aj is holding him and trying to help him and he's like called for help but benji blacks out and just freezes to death and like maybe the tried to resusitate him but it didn't work and yeah and whoops

but canonically he lives but was probably in the hospital because of the hypothermia and just trying to like slowly raise his body temperature so he doesn't go into shock from the sudden jump in temp and idk if aj is there with him but if he is, benji just like holding onto his hand weakly and he just is exhausted and yeah


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fishy kisses ∞ dump
[Image: giphy-facebook_s.jpg]


[align=center][div style="margin-bottom: 5px; margin-top: 3px; word-spacing: 2px; letter-spacing: 0.5px; font-family: verdana; font-size: 8pt;"]will probs be kinda slow to reply  ⸺  [ dump ]
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he was super angry for most of his life
like actually 95% of his life

but when he was 16 he was just kinda like "okay, i need to chill out, and try this being kind and good thing, and love myself, and everyone else can suck it because i'm going to be happy regardless of them"
he's just very confident in himself now
and people are often like "why don't you stand up for yourself?"
and he's just kinda like "because your version of standing up for myself means fighting w/ words and fists, my version of standing up for myself is being strong, moving on, and not letting people get to me enough to make me be the person i used to be again"


he's not weak, he's anything but, but he also doesn't think that violence does anything but escalate a situation, and that the best thing is to support someone/yourself and leave a toxic situation instead


WAIT
maybe his dad hits his mom or something and camber comes up behind his dad and kills him? and that's why they're running? but for some reason he leaves his mom, maybe she's angry

or we can do the gang money
either one is a good idea

BLAKE CARES ENOUGH TO HELP HIM
honestly, blake's mom is just going to be his mom, because she's not overprotective but she is protective and she's the great kind of mom who makes empanadas on sunday and kicks ass at her career on monday
she's wasn't perfect when he was growing up bc she was always working and he didn't have a dad so he felt super neglected and like his sister was the only person who cared about him, but now him and his mom are good

and also his mom originally made him feel really shitty about being gay but then she accepted him and now she's his strongest ally

but his mom has definitely influenced his anxiety/depression and he still feels very insecure about dating someone

blake is also a lucky boy
okay
suck it up @myself no angsty blake for you just blake who loves camber sorry not sorry





[div style="background=transparent; borderwidth=0px; bordercolor=; width: 300px; font-size: 8pt; line-height: 125%; text-align: justify; font-family: verdana; color: black"]・゚✧ and there we were caught in space and time. for a moment i thought i could be yours, you could be mine.
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like it takes him a moment to register that aj saidd that and to process it and he's known for like a while that he loves aj and that he wants to be with aj forever and he always gets so giddy seeing aj in his varsity jacket with gilner stitched on the front and hearing aj said that brought hope to him that he wasn't unlovable or unwanted and that he had someone who wanted to be with him despite all the bullshit, that the person he tormented for so long had found it in his heart to not only forgive him but to love him. benji knows he doesn't deserve aj or happiness but perhaps that could change

and now im sad because this is equal parts happy and sad oops


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[align=center][div style="font-size:14pt; font-family: georgia; color: #29181C;"]i told myself that i wouldn't be scared
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[align=center][div style="font-size:14pt; font-family: georgia; color: #29181C;"]i told myself that i wouldn't be scared
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[align=center][div style="font-size:14pt; font-family: georgia; color: #29181C;"]i told myself that i wouldn't be scared
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[align=center][div style="font-size:14pt; font-family: georgia; color: #29181C;"]i told myself that i wouldn't be scared
but i'm still having nightmares [color=#29181C]characters | trashcan
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