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- character(s): krystal and jem, mentions of others
- brief summary: basically a oneshot of jemkrys making a video explaining why they hadn't been making videos at the time of "the accident." the actions/explanation will be italicized, and his dialogue, since that's what this is mostly going to be, is going to be normal ( emphasized words will be bolded ).
- trigger warnings: description of violence ( car accident ), talk about depression and not eating + description of physical appearance as a result of this and hospitalization
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it'd been a few months since they'd uploaded a video because of recent events, but they'd been in some of their friends' vlogs, and fans were going crazy, wanting an explanation. of curse, jem and krys knew they deserved one. krys brought it up, and jem was hesitant, because krys had just been released a week prior and it was so soon, but krys was adamant. they decided to wait another day, and then sat down in krys' room with their camera on its stand in front of them.
their hands shook and their legs jiggled, nerves washing over them. maybe this isn't such a good idea, right now, krys. i mean, we're both still shaken up, especially you, and-
krys cut him off with a shake of his head, putting his hands over jem's. it's okay. you don't have to do this, i can do all the explaining if it's easier for you.
it was jem's turn to shake his head,a nd he squeezed krys' hands. no, no; i'm not letting you do this by yourself.
they smiled tentatively at each other, and for a few moments just sat in silence before jem spoke up again. okay... let's do this.
krys nodded his head and got up to turn the camera on. jem smiled wearily at the lens as krys moved to sit back down, then looked at krys and wrapped a protective arm around him. krys smiled tiredly at the camera and waved briefly.
hey, guys. it's been awhile, huh?
they both laughed nervously before he went on. so, lots of you guys, if not most or all of you, have been worrying and begging for an explanation as to why we haven't uploaded in... awhile. and before i say anything else, i want to thank each and every one of you for caring so much. you're all such beautiful people, and jem and i are thankful to call you our family.
jem turns to the camera and nods, and speaks up. you guys have such big hearts, and that's one of the many things we love about you guys.
they sit in silence for a few moments, looking at each other, at their hands, and anywhere but the camera. they'll edit that out later. krys takes a deep breath and looks up at the camera, jem's head resting on his shoulder, hiding his face.
okay, so, uhm, i guess we should start from the beginning. about three and a half months ago, jem got into a... a car accident.
he stops for a moment to gulp down the lump forming in his throat, and jem kisses his jaw before looking up and continuing for him. like krys said, i was in a car accident a few months back, and it was... pretty bad. i was kind of going in and out of consciousness and don't remember much before i went into, like, a week and a half long coma.
his voice had started to shake by the last sentence, and he stops to take a breather and look over at krys, who's chewing on his lower lip. there's another moment of silence before krys continues.
while jem was in a coma, i was probably by his side the entire week and a half, save for when denny, sam, chandler, dean, or someone else forced me to get up and out of the room.
his eyes were cast down, too anxious to look into the camera's lens. i... i lost my appetite, and my already fucked up sleeping schedule got even more fucked up, and long-story-short i was like... a guess, like, a shell of who i was? am?
he takes a deep breath, shrugs, and shakes his head with a nervous, breathy laugh. jem whispers something in his ear, and krys gives him a kiss on the cheek, whispering something back. they smile at each other and jem hides his face against krys' shoulder again.
i lost a lot of weight that didn't need to be lost, and after jem woke up, i still found it really hard to eat and keep it down. jem, for the first few days, could barely move, and i wanted to stay by him as much as i could to support him. he was released like a week later, and that night we'd planned to all have a sleepover, including tate and jai and all our good buddies, and have a movie marathon. i hadn't been feeling right all day, i was dizzier than usual and i hadn't eaten anything, i was running on not even thirty minutes of sleep in a two day period, and... i guess my body just, like, shut down. it was done. this has happened before when i was younger and i should have said something, but i was - am - too fucking stubborn to admit when i'm not feeling okay, and jem had just gotten out of the hospital after so long, and i didn't want to ruin the mood, y'know? so i didn't say anything, and the last thing i remember, that night, is laying on the couch and passing out during the second movie.
he stops and takes a deep, shaky breath, and wipes his dainty hands over his hollowed face before fixing the beanie atop his head. jem whispers something to him again, and kisses his cheek, then his temple, and lets krys, who's breaths had turned quicker and shakier, to hide his face in his hands against his shoulder.
as krystal said, is was the night i got back home from the hospital after two and a half weeks, and we all just wanted to relax and, i guess, celebrate me coming home. i hate myself for not seeing it sooner - i mean,it was obvious krys wasn't okay, and i knew it, everyone did, but nobody said anything because... i don't know, i guess we were waiting for him to say something, to come to one of us?
he pauses, krys mumbling something that makes jem mumble back and kiss his head before continuing. we were halfway through the second movie when krys passed out on my shoulder, and no one who was still awake, including myself, thought anything of it. we were all exhausted, krys especially, and honestly, we were all glad he was finally sleeping.
after we finished the fourth movie, mostly everyone was passed out except for me and a couple other of the guys. i wanted to take krys up to his bed, so i tried to wake him up, because i didn't want to risk dropping him while carrying him up the stairs. i wasn't exactly fully awake, and i had to be careful because of the car accident and my injuries.
he swallows, and krys wraps his arms around him. jem chews on his lower lip and wipes at the tears forming in his eyes, and when he continues, he voice is unsteady.
uhm, so, yea... uhm... i tried, y'know, waking him up, and when he wouldn't, the first few times, i didn't really, y'know, think anything of it, because he hadn't gotten a good amount of sleep for awhile and i just thought 'he's out cold, maybe i should just let him sleep.' but i thought, his bed's comfier, so i gotta wake him up. i tried and tried, but he wouldn't wake up, and at that point i knew there was definitely something off. krys has never been a deep sleeper, even if he's really sleep deprived, so i was kind of freaking out at this point.
i hadn't been fully awake before but i definitely was then. i started shaking him more firmly and being louder, not caring that i was waking anyone else up because i was fucking just... i was freaking the hell out.
he takes a few shaky breaths and puts a hand over his face. krys squeezes him lightly and kisses his shoulder, encouraging jem to continue. a few of the others who'd already been awake asked what was going on, why i was being so loud, and i basically yelled at them. i was scared out of my mind. krys wasn't breathing right and he was
not. waking. up.
jem makes a noise that's between a muffled cry and a whimper, and puts his head in his hands, tears falling down his cheeks. he embraces krys and holds him close, but not too tightly, and they stay like that for awhile. they cry onto each other's shoulders and whisper sweet things into each other's ear, and pepper kisses over each other's faces. they reassure each other, and after a good fifteen minutes, jem wipes away his tears and looks back up at the camera, and continues.
long-story-short, half of us freaked out while the other half stayed calm and guided us to the hospital. krys-
he choked on his words, and krys whispered something to him, an inquiry, and jem shook his head and told him it was okay. krys held his face in his hands and smiled, asking if he was sure, and jem nodded before continuing again. krys flatlined in the ambulance, and i... i'm surprised they didn't just throw me out of the fucking truck. thank the fucking heavens they got his heart beating again, though.
more tears pool in his eyes and fall, and his sniffles quietly. for about a week, krys stayed in the hospital, just like i had been, but after the first few days, the doctors had started to lsoe hope after learning this had happened before, to krys. they told us his body had shut down, and that it was trying hard to fight, but with how malnourished and dehydrated and sleep-deprived he was, to the point his hair had started to fall out and he bruised easier and his nails become brittle, there was a big chance he wouldn't...
a sob wracks his body, and he shakes his head, saying over and over that he couldn't do this, that they should stop. krys shushes him and holds him, head to chest, and tells him he'll cotninue for him. basically, they thought i wasn't gonna wake up, but i did some time later, obviously, and yea. i was sent home a week or so later, but with orders to stay under strict supervision and yada yada. to wrap this all up, we had a shitty couple of months, and we just wanted to take a break from making and uploading our own videos for awhile to rehabilitate. jem's injuries aren't all completely healed, but definitely better to the point where he can
finally carry me everywhere again.
he lets out a giggle, and laughs a little more at jem's wet laugh and shake of his head. i still look like a fucking corpse, but i am getting better, stronger, thank
god, and... yea!
krys claps his hands together and jem takes a deep breath before looking up at the camera with a shaky smile of his own. we're doing a lot better now, and we should be getting back to uploading again soon. in the meantime, we'll probably be starring in a lot of our friends' videos because we're not the ones who have to edit them and shit, so yee!
they both laugh, and after a few moments, krys practically bounces on the edge of the bed. oh! and i shaved my head, it looks stupid, i am an egg, and we're together now. see ya guys later!
krys and jem laugh as the former gets up and quickly turns the camera off. jem wraps his arms around krys and pulls him down into his lap, and leans back until his lying on his back on the bed, legs over the edge and krys laying on top of him, giggling.
i love you so much. my beautiful egg.
le chaos. | another marsy dump.
