a slice of normality // private, eddie

[blake k.]

  She had propped herself so she was laying back against some pillows. After a long and painful birth, she was now the mother of two two-year-olds and two newborns. She had four god damn kids. Keiron and Louis were in each arm, only content now because they were asleep. She would probably be asleep too but she had okayed Thomas, Lottie, and Eddie to come by. Besides, it probably made the most sense for them to come to be the first to meet the twins.

A smile appeared on the ginger's face as her older two came walking in, Tommy waving to her (which of course she waved back) and Lottie going "Hi mommy" which of course got a soft "Hi baby" in response. Blake looked from their older two to Eddie, making no mention nor comment on the fact that she was actually wearing his shirt, but instead "Can you put them on the bed for me?" she asked hopefully, knowing the bed was a bit too high for them to climb onto. She had least wanted Tommy on the bed, she knew the little Momma's boy pretty well for obvious reasons.

It was then determined that introductions were in order. "This is Louis, he's older. And this is Keiron" she introduced, nodding her head towards which twin was which as she introduced them. Then she looked to Eddie again "Want to hold one?" like she really had to ask, but she wanted an arm free anyways to interact with the other two. At least once one arm was free she could adjust for both her hands to be free enough that she could explain the babies to not only Lottie but to Tommy.

"Did you explain them to the kids yet?"

[spoiler=TAGS 5/31]
One taught me love — general
▪ Blake Kegan | Blake, Blakie | open to nicknames
▪ AFAB | Identifies as Genderfluid | she/they
▪ 20 | Born July 26th | ages real time
▪ combat | member of Flintlock Lodge

One taught me patience — physical
♦ Health: 100%
— They stand at 5'9" with semi-long wavy ginger hair. She has a rose tattoo and a few scars from past events. She's closer to an athletic build and is on the thinner side.
— minor injuries: n/a
— major injuries: n/a

And one taught me pain — important info
▪ Broad Australian accent
▪ She's either your mom, sister, or wife friend
▪ 

Now, I'm so amazing — personality
— I like to think Blake is a good example of the whole "strong, independent woman" thing even if she doesn't identify as a woman. She has a short temper and what I gently put as homicidal tendencies. She will gladly fight someone, regardless if they're bigger than her or not. However, she's also rather maternal and is more likely to protect a child than anything. Her maternal side has massively shown itself since the twins were born, though that leaves her more violent side to be overlooked or forgotten.
— Maternal, "Strong Independent Woman", Protective
— Violent, Homicidal Tendencies, Short Tempered

I've loved and I've lost — relationships
▪ Ryan Kegan x Katherine Kegan
▪ Pansexual | Panromantic | Polyamorous
▪ Single | Crushing on no one | Maybe Crushing on no one
▪ Ex-wife of Edmund Moray
▪ Mother of Thomas, Charlotte, Louis, and Keiron Moray

But that's not what I see — interaction
— Physically very hard | Mentally intermediate
— Uses combound bow and arrows
— Also skilled in hand to hand combat
— No killing and ask before major injuries or major interactions
— To attack, [member=9567]Noccy[/member] & attack in #B34600
[/spoiler]

[EDMUND.]

Together they were a family, broken by Edmund’s own emptiness. A gaping hole which needed to be filled by something which could make him feel whole again. But he was still so vacant and unclean, pleading for something to qualm his aching bones from that heavy weight of guilt sat upon his shoulders. Perhaps Blake was lucky to have escaped him when she had the chance; her life would be so much safer without him, so much more fulfilling than a life with a hollow vessel of a man. Their children would grow up somewhat detached from a father who tried all he could to prove to them that they were his number one priority, and yet he struggled relentlessly with his own self-image to ever fully focus on their lives.

He wanted a family life, but Eddie was afraid that he did not deserve it.

Two healthy young boys were born, Eddie had been informed by two brothers who got to meet his sons before he even could. And, when Ed was informed that Blake was all right with him coming to meet the boys, he had to admit that he was somewhat surprised. But, Eddie wouldn’t pass up this moment for anything.

❝ You wanna go and see Mommy? ❞ Eddie mumbled softly as he carried Thomas and Charlotte in his arms, the two excitedly squirming toddlers eager to meet their new brothers. As he reached the door, Eddie lowered them to the ground, softly knocking before creaking the door open for the toddlers to lurch in curiously. ❝ Can you put them on the bed for me? ❞

Ed was silent as he neared the side of the side, beginning to prop the two toddlers up onto the bed as they then crawled over to meet their brothers. Quietly, Ed too gazed over at the two newborns - his sons - and, with a wavering breath, he chose to slowly take a seat at the end of the bed. Louis and Keiron - Eddie had decided that perhaps it would be for the best for Blake to choose the names, but he couldn’t say that he disliked them. They were sweet. Fitting. When Blake asked whether he wanted to hold one, Eddie quickly cleared his throat before leaning over to take Louis. ❝ Please. ❞ His words were quiet, restraining the surge of emotion he felt upon seeing the two newborns.

But, as he cradled Louis in his arms, it was impossible to resist the saline which began to pool in his bloodshot eyes. Thumb gently glided over his soft head, his touch careful and adoring. ❝ Did you explain them to the kids yet? ❞ Eddie looked up. ❝ Uh- yes. Well, a little bit. Isn’t that right, Lottie? ❞ Charlotte crinkled her nose up as she leaned against Eddie, gently looking over and observing Louis. ❝ It’s- it’s babies. ❞ Charlotte chose to provide, a short huff passing Ed’s lips as lips twitched into a ghost of a smile.

He looked up to glance at Blake, instead eyes falling on the shirt that she was wearing. It was one of his. Eyes darted up to look at her for a second before lowering his tearful gaze to look back towards Louis. ❝ They’re beautiful. ❞ Voice cracked as he pointed out in a whisper, slowly pulling the newborn closer to him as he pressed a long kiss to the top of Louis’ head. And, whether it was from the sheer joy of meeting his two children, the despair of his sudden realization that Blake still loved him or the combination and confusion of both, Ed tried to look so small and unnoticeable as he cried silently.

A day like this was supposed to be perfect, so why did he feel so empty?

[align=center][div style="width: 430px; text-align: justify; font-family:verdana; font-size: 7px;"][spoiler=tags : updated 03/06]basics.
⋟ edmund theodore stirling-moray // ed, eddie, moray
⋟ goes by the name edmund moray
⋟ male // he/him
⋟ twenty four // ages real time // born seventh august
⋟ captain of flintlock lodge // formerly a traveler with his family
⋟ mob boss of the stirling crime family
⋟ joined FL two years ago

appearance.
⋟ faceclaim - finn cole
⋟ voice claim - finn cole
⋟ 5'9ft // stocky, well-built frame
⋟ muted blue eyes and dirty blonde hair
⋟ physical health - 100% // current injuries: n/a
⋟ mental health - 60% // depression and deluded thoughts

personality.
⋟ quiet in nature but confident in himself
⋟ completely fearless, almost foolishly so
⋟ insensitive and callous // cares for very few
⋟ very calm and calculative // always planning in his head
⋟ disciplined and practices good self-control
⋟ very flirtatious and persuasive // overly lustful
⋟ aloof and untrustworthy // jealous and deceitful
⋟ tactful and knows how to get what he wants
⋟ can be very nasty when he wants to be
⋟ but can also be very protective and faithful too
⋟ has a strong set of morals // has the quality of honor

relationships.
⋟ alfred stirling x leonora moray // both deceased
⋟ three older brothers // alfonso, thomas & franklin
⋟ the fifth stirling-moray brother, dominik, was killed
⋟ two younger half-siblings // henry & ida
⋟ bisexual but he stays silent about homosexual activity
⋟ ex-husband to blake kegan // was caught cheating
⋟ father of thomas moray and charlotte moray

interaction.
⋟ storage // playlist // pinterest
⋟ physically: very hard // mentally: hard
⋟ father taught him how to kill at a young age
⋟ insensitive towards injuring or killing others // will do so without hesitation
⋟ mentally, he is slowly becoming undone from stress, grief and guilt
⋟ often found guarding the lodge with a rifle
[/spoiler]

[blake k.]

The joy on her face when her children came into the room was certainly one she couldn't ever expect to have. She made it her goal to basically be the parent she never had, which was...very easy. When she offered Eddie to hold one of the boys, she didn't think he'd deny it and he didn't. She used her free hand to do her best to explain to Thomas who the babies were before wrapping an arm around her one ginger child and kissed the top of his head.

She smiled with amusement at her daughter's explanation "You're right, they are babies." she praised, gently rubbing her son's head as she watched him look at one of his new brothers. "They're going to be your brothers, okay? Like Tommy." "Like Tommy" she repeated with a nod which only made Blake laugh lightly.

She noticed the glance she got from him, but she didn't say anything on it. She didn't need to, it spoke for itself. But even she knew there was no such thing as happy endings, with Eddie or otherwise. Blake looked over to Lottie and then to Eddie, who held their fourth child in his arms. "Don't think this makes things better, Edmund. I still don't want you around them alone" No it may not be the time or place, but she needed him to know that. His brothers were there and not him for a damn good reason after all.

Blake tapped Thomas on the shoulder to look at her before pointing to each brother and slowly spelling out their names for him to let him know which was which and how to spell their names. This included her making him spell them with her before smiling happily to him. "If I didn't scare Alfie and Thomas, I think I do now" she smirked, glancing towards Eddie.

[spoiler=TAGS 5/31]
One taught me love — general
▪ Blake Kegan | Blake, Blakie | open to nicknames
▪ AFAB | Identifies as Genderfluid | she/they
▪ 20 | Born July 26th | ages real time
▪ combat | member of Flintlock Lodge

One taught me patience — physical
♦ Health: 100%
— They stand at 5'9" with semi-long wavy ginger hair. She has a rose tattoo and a few scars from past events. She's closer to an athletic build and is on the thinner side.
— minor injuries: n/a
— major injuries: n/a

And one taught me pain — important info
▪ Broad Australian accent
▪ She's either your mom, sister, or wife friend
▪ 

Now, I'm so amazing — personality
— I like to think Blake is a good example of the whole "strong, independent woman" thing even if she doesn't identify as a woman. She has a short temper and what I gently put as homicidal tendencies. She will gladly fight someone, regardless if they're bigger than her or not. However, she's also rather maternal and is more likely to protect a child than anything. Her maternal side has massively shown itself since the twins were born, though that leaves her more violent side to be overlooked or forgotten.
— Maternal, "Strong Independent Woman", Protective
— Violent, Homicidal Tendencies, Short Tempered

I've loved and I've lost — relationships
▪ Ryan Kegan x Katherine Kegan
▪ Pansexual | Panromantic | Polyamorous
▪ Single | Crushing on no one | Maybe Crushing on no one
▪ Ex-wife of Edmund Moray
▪ Mother of Thomas, Charlotte, Louis, and Keiron Moray

But that's not what I see — interaction
— Physically very hard | Mentally intermediate
— Uses combound bow and arrows
— Also skilled in hand to hand combat
— No killing and ask before major injuries or major interactions
— To attack, [member=9567]Noccy[/member] & attack in #B34600
[/spoiler]

[EDMUND.]

[align=center][div style="width: 430px; text-align: justify; font-family: verdana; font-size: 6pt; letter-spacing: 2.5px; word-spacing: 0px; line-height: 12px; color: #000"]He should’ve predicted that a moment as perfect as this would only be fleeting.

❝ I still don’t want you around them alone. ❞ Edmund stilled as glazed over eyes scanned over his newborn son’s face, features hardening with stoicism. Was this the time and place to discuss any of this? In front of their children? Whilst in this situation Tommy was lucky not to hear those words, Charlotte certainly could. She didn’t react, apart from shuffling closer to Eddie so that she could hold onto Louis’ hand. Eddie was seething but, most importantly, he felt hurt. Of all the bad things he had done in his life, all he wanted was to show that at least he could be a good father to these children.

Sometimes he felt that he needed them more than they needed him.

Slowly, Eddie shook his head in silence. No. He was exhausted by this. All of it. He knew that what he’d done was the greatest form of betrayal, but Blake had to start acting more fucking civil than this. ❝ No. ❞ He responded plainly, voice quiet before he looked over towards Blake. He wanted to be the better person - not continue this conversation in front of the children - but he couldn’t continue this way. A moment which was supposed to be so beautiful, and yet he felt nothing but pain.

He looked at her face, eyes darting across her features before he began to speak. Softer, less abrasive than when it was just the two of them - after all, the last thing he would’ve wanted was for the kids to be frightened by an argument. ❝ How long are you gonna punish me for, ‘ey? How long? ❞ Brows bunched together sternly, eyes red and glazed. A grimace began to contort his features with hurt. The woman he once thought he loved became the woman he began to despise; the woman who denied him access to his own beautiful children.

❝ I’ve respected your wishes as their mother for four months, Blake. Four months. But they’re as much my children as they are yours, and I hope you come to respect that for what it is. If you don’t want to respect me, then at least have some goddamn respect for your kids. They deserve to spend time with their father without round the clock surveillance. ❞ Nostrils flared, heart slamming against his chest as he lowered his gaze again to look down at Louis.

Eddie was silent for a moment, wrapping one arm around Charlotte to hold her closer, before he uttered softly, voice cracking, ❝ I know you hate me… I know, and- ❞ He worked his jaw, then adding, ❝ I don’t blame you, but just… don’t use our kids as ammunition against me. It’s killing me. ❞

[spoiler=tags ― updated 06/06.][size=6pt]◜BASICS ┊ SO THIS IS WHERE WE ARE◞
&. ❝ edmund theodore stirling ❞ | ed, eddie | male [he/him] .
&. 24 years old . | seventh august ; leo .
&. currently the captain and official loyalist of flintlock lodge .
&. currently the boss of the stirling's notorious irish crime family .

◜PERSONALITY ┊ IT'S NOT WHERE WE HAD WANTED TO BE◞
&.  ambitious . brave . calm . disciplined . honorable . intelligent . leading . logical . patient . reliable . skillful . trustworthy . wise . aloof . cynical . detached . flirtatious . harsh . jealous . lustful . pessimistic . quiet . ruthless . secretive . stubborn .

◜ APPEARANCE ┊ IF HALF THE WORLD'S GONE MAD ◞
&.  five foot eight & one hundred and seventy one pounds ; reference .
↳ dirty blond hair kept very short and neat .
↳ stocky and well-built frame , lightly freckled skin .
↳ muted blue vacant eyes , unreadable , somewhat frowning expression .

◜ FAMILY ┊ THE OTHER HALF JUST DON'T CARE , YOU SEE◞
&. alfred stirling x leonora moray | both deceased .
&. four older siblings and two younger half-siblings .
↳ dominik stirling , 32 , shot and killed by alfred .
↳ thomas stirling , 32 , caretaker in flintlock .
↳ alfonso stirling , 28 , enforcer in flintlock
↳ franklin darrow , 25 , estranged in bluestem .
↳ henry stirling , 11 , resident in flintlock
↳ ida stirling , 9 , resident in flintlock
&. also lives with four cousins and his aunt .
&. father to thomas , charlotte , kieron and louis .

◜ RELATIONSHIPS ┊ YOU DON'T WANNA FUCK WITH US◞
&. bisexual, biromantic ; mongamous | tends to have a wandering eye .
&. ex-husband to blake kegan
↳ marriage fell apart after he cheated on her .
&. ex-lover to mickey serge
↳ he learned about his bisexuality with him .
&. ex-lover to cove lefebvre
↳ one of the other women , pregnant with his baby .
&. lover to maxine van doren
↳ a rekindled flame where their relationship is kept a secret .

◜ INTERACTIONS ┊ BRITISH TO THE VERY LAST ◞
&.  [ 9/10 ] physically  |  [ 7/10 ] psychologically .
↳ difficulty w/ guns [ very difficult ] | difficulty w/ melees [ difficult ] | difficulty w/ hand-to-hand [ difficult ]
&. [member=2919]truce.[/member] | dm for any major plots .
&. friendly or nonviolent actions may be powerplayed .[/size][/spoiler]