make myself a king | writing and art dump

[endless]

[align=center][div style="width: 450px;; text-align: justify"]//changing discord's name to entropy
trigger warning for child abuse, gore, violence and torture

Uglyclown quietly walked down the hall behind his father, eyes narrowed as his mother Leila stuck close to his side. His father was going to pay for what he did to her. He's hurt her before though not in front of him, but this time he crossed the line. He didn't stare at the new burn that blemished her, but rather the emotional hurt she felt - and that hurt made him furious. Of course, Uglyclown had grown to hate his father long before - but he had hated the idea of hurting someone even if he didn't quite understand the concept, which had held him back from ever trying anything. But he was forgetting his sense of pacifism in his anger, and only feeling the frustration of needing to rid Entropy from his life - or for that matter, anyone who knew Entropy. He knew there was something beyond this prison - he didn't know what it was, but he remembered it. He remembered the first glimpse of something he'd never see again - brightness. It was bright and everything was colorful, meanwhile everything here was either too dark to see or dark brown. He had been quickly pulled away from the colors when he saw it.

From his training he had learned he had powers - though even in his training he didn't use them often unless his father challenged him to use them. He knew they were powerful, though he didn't know how much. Both blue eyes were colder then usual as he walked straight in a cocky manner, and he hoped neither parent noticed it. Though, he'd noted Entropy seemed particularly more tense then usual recently. As for why he didn't know, but he was less focused more and had once even flinched at his touch. And right then he was more spaced out then ever, which was the perfect chance to strike. Feeling warmth within him, he felt the warmth split carrying to his feet and mouth, making him realize he was doing it right so far. His jaws clenched, and he took a defensive stance when stepping backwards and electricity came from his forepaws and it sprang from his opening jaws, creating a massive ball of electricity that began to hurl towards Entropy who had walked too fast and was a few feet away.

The crackling and storm-like noises had given it away, it was almost deafening really - everyone pinned their ears back and his parents closed their eyes, though Uglyclown kept one eye open as he stared with hope in it. As the smoke cleared up, he was faced with disappointment as he heard it continue to crackle around a thick wall of water, though he saw that his father had hit the ground on the other side. Uglyclown was breathing heavily from the amount of power he put into it, he could feel his head spinning and felt he was on the verge of passing out as he stared at his father, though his sight was too blurry to see the expression. Though... If he had, he'd be proud to find the expression was fright. But since he couldn't see it, he could only daydream that his father burst into tears because of what he had just done. While Entropy might be frightened, he was far from a wimp anyways - Uglyclown wished his father was a wimp. Everything suddenly was darker, till he couldn't see anything at all - the only thing left was the angered voices of his parents. He'd never come to understand why his mother sounded angry after he did that, it was the same disappointed voice she'd told him "you're worthless." Did he do something wrong to her? Was it anger at his father? He never knew, and he never asked.

But at the time he also hoped he didn't hurt her. Whatever happened he hadn't know for awhile. But after a few hours later, he woke up.

His eyes looked around feeling the usual chains, though this time he was very tightly chained to the floor and in the center of the room, it was a room he wasn't familiar with. Turning around he'd be met with the sight of Entropy sleeping on a desk covered in papers. What's gotten into him lately? Was the asshole weakened by the fact he was torturing his kids and wife, if they could even be called that? Uglyclown used a lot of energy the last time he was awake when he used his ability against his father. Though... He could still muster something up, right? It didn't take much energy to manipulate air if he didn't overdo it. He'd try it when he was alone and it had worked - he was weak in his air elementals apparently, but he could still damage himself unintentionally while practicing. Watching quietly as Entropy snored, he'd wait till his father took a deep breath out and then he instantly stopped any air-flow going to the mouth or nose with his elementals. However his father immediately tumbled off his desk, and he could hear Entropy breathing now that he was awake. Damn it.

Entropy stood up as his claws clacked against the hard stone beneath them. Uglyclown had never felt more superior in his life - he had done something more then cry in fear - though, he had to admit right now he felt like he had to stifle a few whimpers as his father coughed a bit loudly. "Ugly, do you know what you did a few hours back?" He'd question. Uglyclown barely understood the end of his sentence, so he'd stare with big eyes up at him in confusion. He knew he was asking him something, and he watched Entropy frustratedly turn to the side for a few moments. He's never seen him with such a furious expression once he woke up - he's seen him 'angry,' but nothing like this. "Do you know what you did?" He'd question, making it easier to understand. Uglyclown responded with ease. "I trained you." The scruffy boy replied. He had learned that the word 'trained' was the same thing as 'fought' - his father always got frustrated when he was forced to communicate with him. Entropy glared down at him, raising a paw as a threat to hit him which made him recoil in fear trying to figure out what he did wrong. Entropy harshly slammed the paw against the ground and it cracked a little. "You did not train me. You tried to kill me." Entropy replied coldly.

Uglyclown would stare up, interested in the new word. "Kill?" He'd echo innocently, and almost in a shout as he'd repeat it to himself to get used to it. "What's kill?" He'd ask. Entropy cleared his throat, seeming to search for a way out of this - to quickly get his point through so he could get to the important part. Entropy towered over him, which made him begin to shake crouched as low as he could be. "When you do what you say is train, and we were to both do this at each other..." He'd give a very rough smack across the face that made him jolt, but Uglyclown still quickly nodded nervously as he interpreted it as pain. "You are fighting. And what you feel is pain." Entropy would begin to pace back and forth as he continued. "And if I did that more to you, it would kill you. You would..." Entropy thought for a moment on how to word it. "You would be what the other Ugly was. That is what kill is - fighting someone till they become that." He'd finally finish this rant, letting the information sink into Uglyclown's mind. His father had noted he struggled to understand something when he didn't think about it - thinking was rather important to him, considering he already knew little of the world around him and needed to absorb anything he could.

Gone. That is what the other Ugly was. He had been beaten in front of his very eyes, to prove a point that Uglyclown hadn't quite understood since it was being made again. 'Ugly' was his twin he had desperately clung to every night when his mother was temporarily gone since his father was aware he needed something to comfort him. He hadn't understood why Ugly was gone because of his father, since after all - that Ugly was his father's favorite. The other Ugly had gone outside of the prison here a few times, or maybe that was another room and he just thought he went out of this hellhole. "Okay." Uglyclown said to confirm he understood perfectly well, a little more stable then before. However that was quick to change as Entropy glared at him, face right up to his as his awful breath reached his nose. "When you try to kill me you're bad. You're very very bad. You've never been more bad." His tone was less carefree - it usually had a more playfully sinister tone, though this time he was serious. He wasn't fooling around with him.

He could end up being like his twin, gone.

Watching as a very small knife appeared, his form would shake and shiver, hackles raised as he looked up with tears in his eyes. "Sorry! Sorry! Sorry!" He would cry out in response, but it seemed too late to apologize. His father would whip his tail irritably, before he'd take the knife and bring it close to Uglyclown's face. The young kitten was familiar with the weapon - he had seemed to take a liking to it when he had trained. This was not a case where he was safe, he was clearly the prey and his father the predator in this situation. The knife was close, but suddenly he was no longer able to watch it, barely able to see at all as he tried to close his eyes screaming in excruciating pain as it cut into his left eyeball. "No! No! Too much, too much! Too much!" On occasion his father had to know for sure whether he was in pain if it was a fragile experiment and would have him say when he couldn't take it, though now was not the time. Entropy likely couldn't care whether he was dead or alive at this point, he hadn't the past times he's done something like this to someone.

Uglyclown could hear the roots in his eye snapping as his father began to slice down it, blood pouring from his eyes, screeching more as his head would shake only cutting up the side of his eye more. His father had already planned to do this, though he had wanted to wait - however he had a good reason to test his pain tolerance now. This would be the first time Uglyclown got a taste of how cruel Entropy really could be - he thought he was awful now, but he'd never be able to look him in the eyes again, at least not with both eyes anyways. There were multiple slices where the knife had slashed at as his useless screams rang through the room, and it was a dark pink behind said slices as his father forcefully sawed the rest of the eye out and it popped out with a disgusting plop to the ground. The whole time Uglyclown was breathing heavily, shaking and screaming and crying. The pain was unbearable.

Uglyclown had pulled about as much as he could with restrained moment, and he was trying his best to heal himself as his mother had taught him. However, he had too much struggle concentrating as well as having the energy to do so. Before his eye was fully out, he fell unconcious form rising and heaving slowly, seeming to be near death. Entropy narrowed his eyes as he'd slowly put a paw to him, absorbing some of his pain as he calmly observed. "You have a good amount of pain tolerance." A smug smile came across his lips as he unchained his child - no, his slave - and carried him by the scruff to his cell, in which his mother was not in - just as it should be. "Though it doesn't seem right." Entropy would observe aloud as he'd turn away. There was clearly something wrong that Uglyclown could even stand the pain that long after he used his energy so much. He knew he had willpower, though the amount of strength against pain was rather remarkable, too remarkable. He'd have to figure out what had caused this, considering the boy often passed out by a rough hit to the head. No, this wasn't normal.

//2099 words my fingers hurt

[CIRCUSCLOWN!]

experimental art of circ and his mother.
version that isn't resized




version with no background or text

[endless]

[align=center][div style="width: 450px;; text-align: justify"]//trigger warning for child abuse

Uglyclown hummed cheerily. His mother had begun to teach him the alphabet, but when she wasn't looking he would scribble little things with the ink on his claws. He had thought of a genius idea - to draw his family. His brother, his mother, and of course himself. He often tried to draw his surroundings, taking in every dark color around him and the cold floor. Uglyclown slowly drew one circle, then he scribbled a goofy looking neck and slowly making an ugly oval. Drawing a shaky line for the tail, he'd make multiple lines up and down for the legs. He drew a large smile on the face face, and following he drew two more. One was taller then who he had made, but the other was short too, and right behind the first one. They all were happy-looking in his eyes - he was the one in the middle, though it wasn't obvious. He had entirely forgotten the ears, though he seemed satisfied with what he drew.

He however was a sleepy creature - as he began to draw his surroundings, he grew exhausted, and bored. He had been curled up, drooling on his paper when he felt something roughly push him. He was a deep-sleeper, and sometimes he had to be shouted at to be woken up. However a small shake had made him blink his dull blue eyes open, eagerly looking up at his mothers face - his brother thought her to be just another feline, but he saw her as a brightness in this dark place. "Mommy! Me..." He'd stop, trying to find a way to express himself. He couldn't find a right word however, so he instead hopped up.

He had luckily not smudged his drawings - the last time he drooled his mother seemed upset, though she seemed to try to hide it. Unlike his brother, Uglyclown was the more sensitive one - he noticed the small but important things, though his father deemed it as stupidity to take in others feelings. Pointing at the drawing, his mother seemed to stare at it like it was something unknown to her. She was well aware he made it for her, and for his brother - but she still picked it up with an empty expression and coldly meowed to him. "Uglyclown, no." Her voice was harsh, and right before his very eyes the picture went in flames, leaving him broken-hearted.

He'd turn away and pad further away, not wanting to show his tears as he began to cry. However, his mother had gotten used to what she thought was a fit. He kept on crying, sniffling quietly to himself. Really, watching him function was hard to do for her - she struggled to understand the way he behaved. Perhaps it was because he was sad, but she thought it was bad attitude. Nonetheless, she put herself in his own shoes and approached before her voice was as soft as usual, the trembling voice she seemed to always have. "Sh." It was more of a soft way of saying it then a harsh tone, as she would gently take her paw and give him a hug from behind.

He would point to the ashes, whimpering. "Me - I - Me did it for you." He'd say, struggling to use the right words - he wanted her to know it hadn't just been him playing around for his own amusement. He desperately wanted to please his mother, though it felt impossible because she had a tendency to push him away. He understood why - she was always so sad, and he knew it had something to do with his father. At least, he thought so. She would gently pat his head, and she would mumble in response. "Yes. I know." She would respond, gently petting him in a comforting and paternal way. He would turn and cry into her arm, as he often did when he was sad. She did not seem to mind, merely staring down at him - he couldn't see the dead and unfeeling expression, but he could feel the comfort he received from her.

(reference to what uglyclown drew. 679 words)

[endless]

[align=center][div style="width: 450px;; text-align: justify"]//974 words
trigger warning for brief violence and captivity


Uglyclown had wandered off when his father fell asleep during a training session, slowly creeping out of the large dark room and coming closer to the familiar sound of rattling cages and the hushed sobs from other animals. Eying that area curiously, he'd look at the array of prisoners. He couldn't go back. His mother was dead now - there was no point even trying to stay alive when it was an endless cycle of torture anyways. He had nobody to protect - his father had told him his duty was to protect Leila, he truly had believed that even without Entropy telling him so. He had the urge to protect and cherish the life around him, and he had been notably more angry then before. He had become a storm in his mind - uncaring, unloving, frustrated, but more then anything he was scared. Not of death, but that he'd kill again.

Though he knew that it would happen again.

Rather then trying to help the animals, he'd slowly pad through the hall past them and to the next room. He didn't know where he was, not at all. He had noticed his father had been struggling to keep up and work after his mother died, why he didn't know but he didn't care either. Hah, the idiot hadn't even locked it. Pushing the door open, he'd begin to run as fast as he possibly could through the halls, searching for an escape. He found himself finding another room - maybe an exit? With the single baby tooth he had left poking out, he'd push the door with all of his force but it didn't budge. It must be locked, which meant he couldn't go any further then what he's found. He could search for clues though.

There was one last door, though. With hope in his heart, he'd race towards it and slam into it, and it went flying open. Single blue eye staring in wonder at what he saw, he padded into the room staring at the desk. Jumping up on it, he'd nearly slip on all the papers but he quickly steadied himself. He couldn't read anything but letters, but he saw an interesting creation before him. Slowly grabbing the unusual device before him, he'd pull it closer to him before flopping it around and studying it. It was all... Dark and stuff. Flipping it, he'd stare at it and click a button and he suddenly found white flashing into his eyes. With a startled gasp for air he'd toss it to the side, though trying to calm down anyways as it nearly fell off the table. Picking it up again thankful it hadn't made much noise, he'd poke around at the buttons until he heard three quiet beeps, though they were slow. Continuing to press buttons it flashed again, when he heard a voice coming from it. It sounded familiar - it was feminine, yet he's never heard a voice like it. It was cold, analyzing - it made his stomach turn. It just creeped him out. The screen was too dark for him to see it. Nearly jumping again, he'd continue to stare.

"Entry Three Hundred Fifty Five.
Entropy has been doing well at handling the main prisoners. However, I have noted he's moving too fast with them. Particularly he has gotten his hopes up for Clown, which could undo the work we have done to him." Now, Uglyclown had planned on seeing if he could use this object for a weapon. However, this caught his interest so instead he sat there listening. He knew his father would find him even if he got out. So he had to find clues more then anything, though he was struggling to understand what she was saying.  "He is progressing too rapidly, he's learning language and fighting so quickly that he has been increasing in intelligence, which could get in our way considering he has been talking back more, and resisting. Entropy has also been getting in the way - I fear he is beginning to feel-" As something threw him into the wall, Uglyclown screamed in fright as he looked up to see Entropy.

Electricity sparking all around him, he'd tremble in horror and the electricity began to bubble more and more as a protective force around himself. Entropy however saw this to be in no way a challenge to get past as he placed his paw to it, slowly absorbing into his paw. With trembling in the kitten-like adult's lip, Uglyclown would leap forward trying to get past Entropy when the other grabbed him by the scruff in his jaws and slammed him into the ground, the camera still on though the voice was drowned out by Uglyclown's constant screaming as he tried to push his father away. "Noooo! Don't take me! I kill you! I kill - I will!" He would shout, searching for the words as he twirled in the other's painfully harsh grip on his scruff. If he was fed enough Entropy likely wouldn't be able to dangle him like a kitten anymore, though that was still possible due to his horribly scrawny form.

Eye watering as Entropy bit harder on his scruff in punishment for his poorly worded threat - empty at the time - Entropy brought him back to his cell and tossed him in there. He was seeming to resist the urge to yell or attack, which made him calm down a little. He couldn't help but wonder what that thing had been talking about - he was unaware that it was called a camera, but nonetheless it had freaked him out hearing someone besides his father talk about him. It had been... Greatly disturbing, really. Who else was behind the scenes? As his father walked away after checking up on everything else, he relaxed a little, only thinking of what had just happened.