09-17-2017, 06:05 PM
[align=center][div style="width: 350px; text-align: justify; line-height: -1%; color: black; font-size: 8pt;"]/this could have a trigger warning for possible suicidal thoughts so please read cautiously
it was never a good idea to leave riley alone with his thoughts and a ton of alcohol. as soon as he had gotten to his home for house arrest, he had started drinking, and he hadn't stopped. he had just lay in bed, chugging down as much alcohol as he could until he could hardly stand. eventually, he began to think, which was never good.
they probably just put you under house arrest because they don't like you.
they don't believe you, why should they? you're an asshole, riley.
you left them there to die.
you killed a man.
what the fuck is wrong with you?
all of the thoughts, racing through his head as he rolled over in his bed, spilling whisky on his sheets and all over himself. he would groan in annoyance and chuck the bottle across the room, letting it shatter against the wall and spill the rest of its contents onto his 'scribbling notebook' and pen. he would slowly curl up, his thoughts only jetting louder and louder.
they left you here, all alone. they're going to let you rot.
why would they want you around? you're disabled. you're useless to them.
you're fucking useless. look at you, curled up in a puddle of alcohol and your own pity- oh wait, you can't.
useless, useless, useless.
you hear that silence? that's no one caring about you.
he covered his ears, squeezing his eyes shut and whimpering softly. he was all alone, his world just a pit of darkness. everything he had ever felt and had pushed back starting to rise as the voice in his head began overlapping, getting louder and louder, the harder he pressed on his ears, trying to make the voice stop.
useless.
riley finally just let out a scream and started sobbing, tears falling from his milky blue eyes as he began to tremble, the voice in his head simply getting to a point where he couldn't even hear his own sobs.
"please make it stop! i'm not useless! i'm not useless!" he yelled over the voice, the quaking that spread through his body making his bed tremble. "i'm not useless! i'm not useless.. oh god, i'm useless, i'm useless, i can't do anything right, fuck, fuck.."
[spoiler=KINDA HARD TO WATCH THIS LIFE GO BY | tags]NAME & NICKNAMES: riley jamison florra | riles
 PREVIOUS NAMES & NICKNAMES: no previous names
AGE, PLACE & DATE OF BIRTH: 24 Years Old, born 01/19/13 in chicago.
GENDER & PRONOUNS: Cisgender, he/him
CURRENT RANK & MEMBERSHIP: member of the northstar district
 PREVIOUS RANKS & MEMBERSHIPS: n/a
SEXUALITY & RELATIONSHIP STATUS: panromantic pansexual; assumed single
 POSSIBLE CRUSHES: n/a
PARENTS & GENERATION: NPC x NPC. Generation Z.
 [i]SIBLINGS & HALF-SIBLINGS: no siblings
FRIENDS & CLOSE FRIENDS: he's lonely
LENGTH & WEIGHT: 6'3" & 130lbs. | riley, being as tall as he is, is underweight. if he were to take off his clothes, you'd be able to see bones and such, but they wouldn't be poking out of him. it's not that he doesn't eat, he just has an extremely fast metabolism, and when he does eat, he hardly eats more than he absolutely has to.
 CLOTHES: riley's clothing often hands off his body, but it's not often you find clothes in this day and age. he wears a light blue long sleeved shirt and a scientists jacket he received from his father at the age of 5. he wears brown dress pants and black shows, and a pair of sunglasses to cover his eyes. he often carries around an umbrella, which helps him figure out were hills and corners are and such.
EYES AND APPEARANCE: riley is blind. you wouldn't know unless he took off his sunglasses, since he functions so well. he's lived his entire life without his sight, and while he'd love to see the world, he'd rather stay blind. if you are one of the few people who get to see his eyes, you would discover that they're an odd, milky blue, and are often narrowed in concentration. he navigated by touching the walls as he walks or in certain situations, he will throw pebbles in the direction he's going as a type of echolocation. moving on from eyes, riley is fairly pale, as he doesn't really tan, and spends a lot of time indoors. his hair is a big mass of brunette tangles that your hand could possibly get lost in if you weren't careful. as mentioned before, he's very skinny and incredibly tall, which applies for his face to. he has cheeks that cave in slightly, and a narrow jaw, but high and sharp cheekbones. a common comparison for him is an elf.
EQUIPMENT: keeps a knife in his back pocket, and his umbrella is often believed to be a weapon of some sorts (hidden blade in the handle)
PERSONALITY: riley is a completely uncaring husk of a human being. long story short, he's an asshole. to the few he cares for, he treats them much harsher than anyone else. he will say that they are expendable and easily replaced, when, in reality, he'd be lost without them. he drinks quite a bit to forget all of the mistakes he's made, and hates admitting when he's wrong. he had a very hard time getting along with others, and often spends his time just feeling things. despite his blindness, he loves to "draw", and by draw, i mean scribble on papers. "drawing" often calms his short temper.
 STRENGTHS: navigating through the world, listening for danger, describing noises, sassing someone
 weaknesses: opening up to people and sharing his feelings, making friends, explaining things, being nice in general, admitting his wrong, admitting when he needs help, actually fighting
INTERACTION: he's incredibly easy to fight due to his blindness, but incredibly difficult to trick. just because he's blind and can't see doesn't mean he can't hear or smell well. if you can actually manage to grab him long enough to fight him, then go ahead, but riley is a very tricky boy, and has been training to run from danger his entire life. if you do attack in, attack in BOLD POWDER BLUE
if i am needed, [b]send me the link to the thread by pming it to me on my main account, dannychan, as that is the first thing i check.
it was never a good idea to leave riley alone with his thoughts and a ton of alcohol. as soon as he had gotten to his home for house arrest, he had started drinking, and he hadn't stopped. he had just lay in bed, chugging down as much alcohol as he could until he could hardly stand. eventually, he began to think, which was never good.
they probably just put you under house arrest because they don't like you.
they don't believe you, why should they? you're an asshole, riley.
you left them there to die.
you killed a man.
what the fuck is wrong with you?
all of the thoughts, racing through his head as he rolled over in his bed, spilling whisky on his sheets and all over himself. he would groan in annoyance and chuck the bottle across the room, letting it shatter against the wall and spill the rest of its contents onto his 'scribbling notebook' and pen. he would slowly curl up, his thoughts only jetting louder and louder.
they left you here, all alone. they're going to let you rot.
why would they want you around? you're disabled. you're useless to them.
you're fucking useless. look at you, curled up in a puddle of alcohol and your own pity- oh wait, you can't.
useless, useless, useless.
you hear that silence? that's no one caring about you.
he covered his ears, squeezing his eyes shut and whimpering softly. he was all alone, his world just a pit of darkness. everything he had ever felt and had pushed back starting to rise as the voice in his head began overlapping, getting louder and louder, the harder he pressed on his ears, trying to make the voice stop.
useless.
riley finally just let out a scream and started sobbing, tears falling from his milky blue eyes as he began to tremble, the voice in his head simply getting to a point where he couldn't even hear his own sobs.
"please make it stop! i'm not useless! i'm not useless!" he yelled over the voice, the quaking that spread through his body making his bed tremble. "i'm not useless! i'm not useless.. oh god, i'm useless, i'm useless, i can't do anything right, fuck, fuck.."
[spoiler=KINDA HARD TO WATCH THIS LIFE GO BY | tags]NAME & NICKNAMES: riley jamison florra | riles
 PREVIOUS NAMES & NICKNAMES: no previous names
AGE, PLACE & DATE OF BIRTH: 24 Years Old, born 01/19/13 in chicago.
GENDER & PRONOUNS: Cisgender, he/him
CURRENT RANK & MEMBERSHIP: member of the northstar district
 PREVIOUS RANKS & MEMBERSHIPS: n/a
SEXUALITY & RELATIONSHIP STATUS: panromantic pansexual; assumed single
 POSSIBLE CRUSHES: n/a
PARENTS & GENERATION: NPC x NPC. Generation Z.
 [i]SIBLINGS & HALF-SIBLINGS: no siblings
FRIENDS & CLOSE FRIENDS: he's lonely
LENGTH & WEIGHT: 6'3" & 130lbs. | riley, being as tall as he is, is underweight. if he were to take off his clothes, you'd be able to see bones and such, but they wouldn't be poking out of him. it's not that he doesn't eat, he just has an extremely fast metabolism, and when he does eat, he hardly eats more than he absolutely has to.
 CLOTHES: riley's clothing often hands off his body, but it's not often you find clothes in this day and age. he wears a light blue long sleeved shirt and a scientists jacket he received from his father at the age of 5. he wears brown dress pants and black shows, and a pair of sunglasses to cover his eyes. he often carries around an umbrella, which helps him figure out were hills and corners are and such.
EYES AND APPEARANCE: riley is blind. you wouldn't know unless he took off his sunglasses, since he functions so well. he's lived his entire life without his sight, and while he'd love to see the world, he'd rather stay blind. if you are one of the few people who get to see his eyes, you would discover that they're an odd, milky blue, and are often narrowed in concentration. he navigated by touching the walls as he walks or in certain situations, he will throw pebbles in the direction he's going as a type of echolocation. moving on from eyes, riley is fairly pale, as he doesn't really tan, and spends a lot of time indoors. his hair is a big mass of brunette tangles that your hand could possibly get lost in if you weren't careful. as mentioned before, he's very skinny and incredibly tall, which applies for his face to. he has cheeks that cave in slightly, and a narrow jaw, but high and sharp cheekbones. a common comparison for him is an elf.
EQUIPMENT: keeps a knife in his back pocket, and his umbrella is often believed to be a weapon of some sorts (hidden blade in the handle)
PERSONALITY: riley is a completely uncaring husk of a human being. long story short, he's an asshole. to the few he cares for, he treats them much harsher than anyone else. he will say that they are expendable and easily replaced, when, in reality, he'd be lost without them. he drinks quite a bit to forget all of the mistakes he's made, and hates admitting when he's wrong. he had a very hard time getting along with others, and often spends his time just feeling things. despite his blindness, he loves to "draw", and by draw, i mean scribble on papers. "drawing" often calms his short temper.
 STRENGTHS: navigating through the world, listening for danger, describing noises, sassing someone
 weaknesses: opening up to people and sharing his feelings, making friends, explaining things, being nice in general, admitting his wrong, admitting when he needs help, actually fighting
INTERACTION: he's incredibly easy to fight due to his blindness, but incredibly difficult to trick. just because he's blind and can't see doesn't mean he can't hear or smell well. if you can actually manage to grab him long enough to fight him, then go ahead, but riley is a very tricky boy, and has been training to run from danger his entire life. if you do attack in, attack in BOLD POWDER BLUE
if i am needed, [b]send me the link to the thread by pming it to me on my main account, dannychan, as that is the first thing i check.
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★ ──────────── {⋅. [abbr=#swiggity swooty I LOVE Hooty]❀[/abbr] .⋅} ──────────── ★
[align=center]gregory / 17 / trans male / married to legiana
[align=center]gregory / 17 / trans male / married to legiana