[align=center][align=center][div style="width:450px;text-align:justify;margin-top:10px;color:#000;"][size=9pt] ― AYA | tags
Darkness. Nothing. There was death, and then blackness. How Aya had died, she didn't remember. Somehow, her life had ended, and then she was floating in the void. Let me out, let me out, let me out
She woke up gasping, feeling much closer to herself than she expected. She was alive. Aya was alive! Standing up on wobbly legs, the fem was immediately aware of her short stature. Wobbling over to a bed of water, she gazed down at her reflection; she was... in her tortie body. The one Barron had killed? A paw was lifted, brushed over where her left eye had once been, a long time ago. But wait, where were her wings?
Aya became a spontaneous contortionist, twisting round to try and look at her wings, or where they had been. Struggling to see, she blinked in shock; were those scars? Who.. the fuck.. had taken her fucking wings? All of a sudden, Aya felt a choking sob rise up in her throat. Abathur had given her those wings, in an experiment. She was so proud of them.
Another thing. Abathur. Tears built up in her yellow eye, wiping the tears away before she had to acknowledge them. Wherever she was, Aya had a feeling it wasn't home. Her stomach was painfully empty as she strained her nose to find some trace of civilisation, dragging her paws along at any sign.
What was that? Shadowclan? Vaguely.. The succubus pushed herself along, feeling like her legs would give out at any moment. She had another feeling that she would recognise nobody in Shadowclan, regardless of where she was, and she suspected her surname would bear no weight, either.
"He- Hello?" Her voice was croaky, her throat dry from lack of use, blinking towards the horizon in an effort to see anyone approaching.
[align=center][div style="width: 450px;; text-align: justify"][size=9pt]There was a lot of things that happened between him and Aya - he couldn't really blame her for him cheating, because he also contributed. But he blamed her for a lot of things that seemed a lot more severe to him - it was almost hard to call them friends now, since looking back it seemed like they were just a bunch of goofballs who had a lot of desires. But things had changed, at least for Circusclown. He no longer had any motivation to do anything, and he had sunk so badly - everything was awful. But hey, he wasn't a murderer anymore. Sometimes he had to ponder, was leaving The Exiles worth it? It always felt like it wasn't - nobody there cared about him anymore.
Circusclown had been very surprised by a familiar figure - life was full of surprises, wasn't it? Everyone from The Exiles was returning. Oh god... God... Was Leonidas going to return? What about Morbidrealities? Or Dystopia? He prayed to god nobody else came here - he wouldn't be able to do it anymore if so. As is, his life had been going downhill and one more thing was going to make him crack. His eye stared at Aya, eye unmoved and a thin smile on his face. He couldn't deny he was happy to see her - he was just... Scared? Scared of what she was like. He was scared she was just like any Cipher.
Trying to ignore that feeling, he'd approach calmly. "Aya, are you okay?" He'd ask. She looked like a mess here - he didn't really want to hug her or anything, the idea of doing so made him feel rather uncomfortable. He could still stand from a distance and smile at her though. What happened to her? Everyone was turning up left and right, confused. Maybe it was some time traveling shit - maybe he was just living through everything again. Though that isn't true, everyone remembered him and they all had the same relationships as they did before when they met again.
Whatever the case, it was such a damn relief to see familiar faces - the faces he wanted to see, anyway. He was sure eventually someone was going to come along and screw up his whole life as they always did. Though, things couldn't get worse - could they? Spoiler alert, things could be awful at literally any moment. But he was okay where he was. Things didn't feel like it was getting better, but he often tried to reassure himself it was. This was something that would make everything better, right?
"I'm so damn glad to see you. The hell have you been?" Circusclown would laugh, seeming not to care about how feeble she looked. Though he did. He noticed the new scars on her, he noticed how she was in the body Barron killed. Circusclown knew they both hadn't gotten along well towards the end - he did want to talk to her about those things as well, since he hadn't exactly forgotten. If she was going to support freaks like the one who hurt his friend, he was afraid he couldn't be her friend. And he had a very... Important question to ask her later as well. It had to do with her brother. Aya was someone he could talk to who wouldn't freak out - but the real question was if she could keep quiet and if she was trustworthy. He had a nervous look in his eye - it was as if he was... Frightened of her? He was. He was - he didn't know why but suddenly he was just shaking. It was only his hind legs, but he was clearly distressed. Goddamnit - fuck all this shit, he wasn't supposed to be a wimp. He was supposed to be strong but he was just a damn coward.
[spoiler=tags]
general ; "drink up baby"
★ circusclown disharmony | nicknames are circ and clown, former names are breadstick, uglyclown and clown | male [ he/him ]
two years four months physically and mentally | born november 13th, 2014 | ages realtime
shadowclan leader | former exiles leader and blizzardclan head combatant (feralfront)
entropy x leila | generation 2 | head of disharmony family | only loyal to family
demisexual | panromantic | crush on leo | afraid of being in a relationship
other facts ★
★ has ptsd, alcoholism and depression.
★ always looks tense and ready to fight
★ can be very irritable one second and then completely switch the next
★ has flashbacks about his mother dying and killing leonidas
★ can cook but dislikes doing so. loves writing and reading.
appearance ; "stay up all night"
★ domestic cat | always scowling | always smells strongly of alcohol
he is a light brown feline who has a lot of fluffy fur that's often tangled up covered in dirt and dust, and it also feels very greasy and gross. his head is lacking of the light brown color, and is completely white. he has a scar on the left side of his face, which has a stitched up glasgow smile meeting up with the scar. the other side of his face shares a glasgow smile, which is also stitched together. he has only one eye left which is the right one, and it is a dull blue almost lifeless color that seems to be bagging all the time due to exhaustion. the side of his face which has no eye has stitches on the top of his eye, and his eyelid is often closed over the eye socket that's still there, though it can be open if he is surprised or scared by something. [ reference ].
personality ; "with the things you could do"
★ chaotic neutral | anti-hero | the cynic
 cynical, insensitive, pessimistic, crude, hostile, family-oriented, overprotective, unpredictable
with a quick look at circusclown, somebody would probably be able to quickly dismiss him due to him having common disinterest, distantness or unnecessary complaints about everything. he rarely has anything positive to say or do, and will come off as a very dull person who wants nothing more then for others to go away. he is very unpredictable and capricious in behavior, and can with ease be watching with a bored expression and the next be a violent creature someone should steer clear of. despite the unpredictable nature, he is quick to make a decision he won't regret - he is never unsure about his decisions, which only worsens his unpredictable behavior. he is extremely cynical and pessimistic, and has a continual feeling of mistrust and pessimistic thoughts of the outcome of every situation. he has a tendency to be very vulgar, constantly with gross behaviors like burping and swearing. he has a tendency to be very unfriendly or harsh to others, and he is rarely sensitive unless in a good mood or if he enjoys somebodies company. he is at heart however, a genuine and sweet person who just wants to have a large family, but feels it is impossible due to his self-destructive alcoholic behaviors and is simply frightened that he'd be taken advantage of if he was to.
interaction ; "you won't but you might"
★ hard physically | hard mentally | attack in #c68ee2
doesn't like unnecessary death or etc | will start fights | will fight back | will flee if family is protected | will not surrender
might capture if family is threatened | might torture if family is threatened | will kill if family is threatened
trained to fight | has little to no medical knowledge
air elementals  discovered  can somewhat control
power  un / discovered  control of power: 000%
ALL OPINIONS ARE IC[/spoiler]
[align=center] oh who would ever want to be king
[align=center][align=center][div style="width:450px;text-align:justify;margin-top:10px;color:#000;"][size=9pt] ― AYA | tags
The tortie's first reaction was shock. Clown. Circusclown. They had a convoluted history, one which Aya couldn't even begin to recall at this time, but after a moment's blinking at the male, she released a quiet gasp and rushed forward to hug the male. She was shaking like shit, ears flattened, her eye squeezed shut as tears threatened to escape. "Clown," she whispered, shivering. "Clown, where the fuck are we? What happened to you. I'm so glad to see you too, I- Fucking hell, I am so fucking hungry." She pulled back, sniffing but smiling and laughing a little in simple relief.
Aya, being particularly self-centered, hadn't noticed Clown's shivering, but she could feel some kind of fear from him. "I'm fine, Clown, just.. confused, I suppose? I don't understand what happened. I don't even remember dying, but I'm sure that I did." A small laugh was emitted, her ears flattening for a moment. "I'm so glad to see you." Her tone quietened for a moment, sincerity filling it.
Everything felt so bright. She hadn't been alive in what felt like forever. She didn't understand how this had even happened. Fucking hell, I wish Abathur was here. He'd have some scientific answer or something. Or maybe she just wanted to see him again.
[align=center][div style="width: 450px;; text-align: justify"][size=9pt]As she hugged him he was met with a feeling of shock, his burned ears pinning back and eye flinching a little, form tensed up more then before. He'd quickly try to give her a brief pat on the back, before trying to push her back in a gentle manner paws shaking a little now. He didn't want her to think he was mad, but he wasn't exactly feeling good enough to give her a hug. In fact, he felt a little queasy now. Facing her, Circusclown could tell she was at the brink of tears. Poor girl - he had been equally confused, but he had managed to remain calm. Maybe that was the difference between them. Either way, opposites attract.
"We're in Shadowclan - uh, right now I'm leading it." The end seemed a little weird to say, but eh. "Don't worry Aya, you're completely fine. We have food and stuff at camp. You're here to stay, right? He'd say, his thin smile now a grin. He could hear the sincerity in her voice - it greatly pleased him, but he still couldn't say he immediately forgave her for anything. He'd actually probably feel pretty angry after his relief washed away - in fact he could already feel it bubbling in him as his smile reverted back to his calm frown, looking away.
"It's... Been a while, hasn't it?" He'd say, eye narrowing in thought. She likely would choose Leonidas over him any day as a friend. That was just how siblings were - Circusclown knew that too. She was sort of a mediator, but he wanted her to realize that it wasn't possible to be so. He didn't know if she changed. Over time, he'd find out. He wasn't as sensitive as Aya - sure, he showed emotion, but he wasn't crying or anything. Was that a bad thing? He often found himself trying to figure out whether he was becoming an emotionless bastard. But whatever - who cared right now? Right now he sort of did - he cared what Aya was going to think about him. If Leonidas ever stepped foot here... If Leonidas ever came here... Fuck... Shit would get bad fast. Swallowing the lump in his throat, he'd laugh nervously. "I died or something too, I think. A few months ago I just sorta stumbled here." He'd add in, a bit distant. He should be happy, shouldn't he? But he wasn't. He was a selfish prick in that way.
[spoiler=tags]
general ; "drink up baby"
★ circusclown disharmony | nicknames are circ and clown, former names are breadstick, uglyclown and clown | male [ he/him ]
two years four months physically and mentally | born november 13th, 2014 | ages realtime
shadowclan leader | former exiles leader and blizzardclan head combatant (feralfront)
entropy x leila | generation 2 | head of disharmony family | only loyal to family
demisexual | panromantic | crush on leo | afraid of being in a relationship
other facts ★
★ has ptsd, alcoholism and depression.
★ always looks tense and ready to fight
★ can be very irritable one second and then completely switch the next
★ has flashbacks about his mother dying and killing leonidas
★ can cook but dislikes doing so. loves writing and reading.
appearance ; "stay up all night"
★ domestic cat | always scowling | always smells strongly of alcohol
he is a light brown feline who has a lot of fluffy fur that's often tangled up covered in dirt and dust, and it also feels very greasy and gross. his head is lacking of the light brown color, and is completely white. he has a scar on the left side of his face, which has a stitched up glasgow smile meeting up with the scar. the other side of his face shares a glasgow smile, which is also stitched together. he has only one eye left which is the right one, and it is a dull blue almost lifeless color that seems to be bagging all the time due to exhaustion. the side of his face which has no eye has stitches on the top of his eye, and his eyelid is often closed over the eye socket that's still there, though it can be open if he is surprised or scared by something. [ reference ].
personality ; "with the things you could do"
★ chaotic neutral | anti-hero | the cynic
 cynical, insensitive, pessimistic, crude, hostile, family-oriented, overprotective, unpredictable
with a quick look at circusclown, somebody would probably be able to quickly dismiss him due to him having common disinterest, distantness or unnecessary complaints about everything. he rarely has anything positive to say or do, and will come off as a very dull person who wants nothing more then for others to go away. he is very unpredictable and capricious in behavior, and can with ease be watching with a bored expression and the next be a violent creature someone should steer clear of. despite the unpredictable nature, he is quick to make a decision he won't regret - he is never unsure about his decisions, which only worsens his unpredictable behavior. he is extremely cynical and pessimistic, and has a continual feeling of mistrust and pessimistic thoughts of the outcome of every situation. he has a tendency to be very vulgar, constantly with gross behaviors like burping and swearing. he has a tendency to be very unfriendly or harsh to others, and he is rarely sensitive unless in a good mood or if he enjoys somebodies company. he is at heart however, a genuine and sweet person who just wants to have a large family, but feels it is impossible due to his self-destructive alcoholic behaviors and is simply frightened that he'd be taken advantage of if he was to.
interaction ; "you won't but you might"
★ hard physically | hard mentally | attack in #c68ee2
doesn't like unnecessary death or etc | will start fights | will fight back | will flee if family is protected | will not surrender
might capture if family is threatened | might torture if family is threatened | will kill if family is threatened
trained to fight | has little to no medical knowledge
air elementals  discovered  can somewhat control
power  un / discovered  control of power: 000%
ALL OPINIONS ARE IC[/spoiler]
[align=center] oh who would ever want to be king
[align=center][align=center][div style="width:450px;text-align:justify;margin-top:10px;color:#000;"][size=9pt] ― AYA | tags
"You're leading Shadowclan? Shit, Clown!" The tortie laughed, taking a step back as she was suddenly aware of their closeness. Not again, nope, not happening. "Of course I'm here to stay, where the fuck else would I go?" Her tone didn't match her words as brightness and humour filled her voice. She didn't have to respond with pleasant profanity at the idea of food, as her stomach did it for her; growling loudly and followed by her laughter. "Food sounds fuuuuuucking good!"
"A while? Felt more like years. You know, I am so glad you're the first person I saw. Wouldn't want anyone else." She wasn't lying, her one eye focused on Clown. If she'd known Clown's thoughts at the time, the concept of her choosing Leonidas over Clown would be laughable. Leo was her brother, yes, but she'd had perhaps two full conversations with him since, when, she joined the Exiles at six moons old? Leo had had many opportunities to get to know his sister, and he refused every one of them. But Clown?
Aya had known Clown for.. ages. She knew him so much better than she knew Leo - hell, Aya barely knew a damn thing about Leo! All she knew was they shared a father and he looked distressingly like said father. That was it. Aya could never bring herself to hate Clown, and that was a fact, one she may not have ever been aware of.
[align=center] [size=8pt][font=verdana]Ho-lee shit. First his dad was here, and now his aunt Aya? Damn, maybe that whole dying thing wasn't so bad, if this was the result. A part of him believed that none of this was real. That this was just his ideal version of heaven, surrounded by his family. This was just too good to be true. But at the same time, he wasn't sure he cared. He deserved this, after all the shit he had been through. The grey feline watched the two of them through the shadows, waiting for the right moment to pop out. Even though he was quite impatient, as he wanted to run over and greet his aunt like an excited dog running to its owner when they walk through the door.
Did she always have that many scars, even when he was a kit? The sight was rather nerve-wracking, seeing as she was his aunt and all. He wanted his family to be safe. If she had scars, that meant at some point she wasn't safe. Gardenghost's ears perked when he heard the voice of the tortie, and he found himself glaring when he heard what she had said. This seemed like a good time as any to make his presence known.
"Not even me?" The male said when he exited the bush, an easy smile on his maw but an air of smugness still surrounding him. Or rather an air of superiority. He didn't exactly see himself superior to any of his family, but after months of feeling like he was above so many others, the superiority complex stuck with him a little. Regardless, he was still delighted to see another member of his family. "Nice to see you aunt Aya."
[div style="background:linear-gradient(to right,#000000,transparent);height:2px;padding:0;width:450px;margin-top:5px;"].
.
[align=center][div style="width:450px;text-align:justify;color:#000;font-size:10pt;font-family:verdana;margin-top:-26px;z-index:1;position:relative;margin-bottom:12px;line-height:21px;"]
[spoiler=THROUGH THE LEAVES ★ GARDENGHOST][size=8pt][font=verdana] general ;
 GARDENGHOST | "GAR" | FTM TRANSGENDER
 QUIROMANTIC | PANSEXUAL (demi??)
 13 MONTHS MENTALLY && 10 MONTHS PHYSICALLY | MARCH 7TH | REALISTIC AGING
 MEMBER OF SHADOWCLAN | WARRIOR
 HALF DEMON
recent events ;
 WOKE UP ALONG THE RIVER NEXT TO HIS OLD BODY
appearance ;
 GREY DOMESTIC CAT /w GREEN EYES | HEALTH: 100%
 Gardenghost, whose body was once littered with scars, is once again a young and healthy-looking feline. His sleek, storm-cloud grey coat was now free of the marks and plants that covered his body once in another lifetime. But by far the most positive change in his body was the fact that his eyes were no longer clouded over and lifeless-looking, now that he was no longer blind. However, there is a downside to his "new and improved" form. His body lacks the muscle that he had gained throughout his moons, and he is once again scrawny.
 REFERENCES : n/a
 MAJOR INJURIES: n/a
 MINOR INJURIES: n/a
personality ;
 AGGRESSIVE
 HOTHEADED
 PROTECTIVE
 CARING
 RESERVED
 REMORSEFUL
 ANXIOUS
 REALLY LOVES HIS FAMILY
relationships ;
 SINGLE | ½ NONE
 NO CRUSH | UNKNOWN PREFERENCE
 CIRCUSCLOWN x LEONIDAS
interaction ;
 MESSAGE THIS ACCOUNT TO PLOT
 ATTACK IN BOLD
 PHYSICALLY EASY && MENTALLY MEDIUM
 WILL FIGHT IF PROVOKED
 TRIES TO AVOID TORTURES
 CAN POWERPLAY PEACEFUL AND NONVIOLENT ACTIONS[/spoiler]
[align=center][align=center][div style="width:450px;text-align:justify;margin-top:10px;color:#000;"][size=9pt] ― AYA | tags
Aya had always had this many scars; they had always littered her fur, serving as physical marks of her life. She was scarred by how she had lived; she lost an eye because she flirted with her captor, she lost her tail because she underestimated the cruelty of a human, she had long slashes of healed skin along nearly every inch of her body from various tortures, fights she couldn't win.
As she saw her nephew, Aya released a surprised scoff and exclaimed, "Gardenpaw?" Her eye was wide, shocked, with a bright grin on her maw. "Mm, well, it's about equal now. But Gar, babe, you've gotten so big!" She went over and aimed to hug Gar tightly, in all honesty so glad to see her beloved nephew again.
[align=center][div style="background-color:;border:;width:490px;text-align:justify;font-size:12px;font-family:georgia;overflow  tretch;color:#5d5c5c;"]Con was never the one for family reunions. It would be lovely if he was though. His parents were elsewhere and he wasn't sure if he had any siblings. The only person he could really fall back on was Cyrus, but he wasn't sure if he counted as family since they were in a romantic relationship. Their "I love yous" isn't exactly something you'd tell your siblings or the people whom birthed you. It took a while but the cream feline was patient with him and somehow Con fell in love. But, putting all of that lovey-dovey stuff aside, the alabaster tabby held his ground a couple meteres away before walking towards them. He could swear everyone in this clan was related somehow. With his usual stoic expression with a light glare in his eyes, the tom meowed dully. "I'm Confinedpaw, welcome." They were having a sort of family bonding moment and he could respect that, but he wanted to introduce himself as quickly as possible then retreat to the tallest tree.
[div style="border:transparent;text-align:center;font-size:11px;line-height:13px;font-family:times new roman;margin-top:9px"]le chat noir attend dans l'obscurité Ã tags Ã le chat blanc se cache en vue
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