[div style="width:500px;text-align:justify;font-size:12px;margin-top:10px;color:#000;line-height:120%"][align=center][size=9pt][font=georgia]❝ EXOLLIARMUS  EPILOGUE. ❞
Ten years later.
Grizzling noises. Two beeps. The grating sound of a connection being established as a voice cuts through the statics–
"Hello all...! You are now tuned to everyone's favourite programme on the Wizarding Wireless Network, your one-stop shop for all the most impractical hot news of the day, and the nitty-gritty bits of gossip that the wizarding community cannot live without:
Beagle Trivia! ...I am your host and newscaster – Park Chanyeol, aka YeolCaster, and here is a special guest from the Muggle-Worthy Excuse Committee who's going to be enlightening you all with the news today... You can say hi now."
"Hello."
"Introduce yourself, mate."
"Oh yeah. Hullo, I'm Kim Jongdae, from the Muggle-Worthy Excuse Committee."
"Excellent! Jongdae's with me to present our news bulletin today. We've got a huge, meaty bunch of interesting trivia – all absolutely useless, as usual – therefore there is a lot of exciting stuff to get into..."
"Cool. Mate. Do I read from here, or like...what, do I just wait for you to cue me in-"
"Just read it from there, man-"
"Okay, cool."
"So our first piece of news today..."
"Yeah, our first piece of news today concerns the rising National Quidditch Team, the one that everyone's been chatting about...the Chaffing Fireballs!"
"Absolutely! That team's youngest player – Kim Jongin just managed to secure another win for his team the other day against Puddlemere United; caught the Golden Snitch within two minutes after the start of the game...
Two minutes, man. That's pretty insane."
"I know, he was already talented back in Hogwarts...but now he's like...on fire."
"Yeah, our Jongin is a promising puppy...Anyhow, with his current record we could very well expect the Chaffing Fireballs to qualify for the Quidditch World Cup which are coming up this year. Exciting, right? Food for thought: Do Kyungsoo and him are apparently still together, and the potions consultant has often been seen at Chaffing Fireballs matches over the last few years..."
"Might as well expect a wedding..."
"With a honeymoon to Hawaii..."
"Passionate dancing under the coconut trees..."
"Yeah, man, we are so getting killed for this."
"We are?"
"Anyways! Second news on the board, in the section – famous people we all want a piece of. Yum... Luhan, the young auror from the Auror Office who's had the highest arrest record this year, has once again – for the seventh time in a row – secured first place for 'Most Charming Smile Award' in Witch Weekly! Bravo!"
"A world record, for the man who claims he's the manliest man ever born on planet Earth."
"His partner Kim Minseok and he are going on holidays to the Bahamas next week. For those who don't know, Kim Minseok is the famous author of the award-winning romantic novels 'Witch and Winks' and 'Frozen in Love'. He worked three years in the Wizengamot before deciding that barrister work was not for him after all, and ended up settling down for a life of writing, along with his long-term boyfriend, Luhan. They bought a house together in France, recently."
"We visited it last summer, didn't we? It was really pretty."
"Super pretty, Merlin, yes."
"What more do you have?"
"Uh, let me see...Oh yeah! Let us talk business, now, as we come onto some more commercial news. Single heir Wu Yifan has finally taken over the
Wu-zzbees business last month, after his father's official retirement. He used the occasion to publicize his relationship with herbologist Zhang Yixing as well. The two are apparently going to tackle their future in common, as well as the future of the company, hand in hand and with a serene heart."
"You know what, that's actually great news. Those two are going to have interesting dynamics. Interesting but very sweet. I wish them all the best."
"Finally, in the category of 'unimportant-news-people-would-rather-not-know'... Kim Joonmyun, head of the Muggle Liaison Office, has been spotted at Honeydukes yet again last week. He has been gaining two kilos in the span of only a month."
"Two kilos and a half, to be precise."
"Oh, you seem to know a lot."
"We run across each other very often, being in similar lines of work and all."
"Yeah, so often that you were apparently found in his office the other day, not – if I believe the rumours – discussing Muggle issues at all."
"...Yes, I see you've got some fashion news on the list as well."
"Ah yeah, that's right. On the rather more flashy note of fashion and extravaganza, Huang Zitao and Oh Sehun have finally opened their own line of Wizards Fashion Gear, which is going to be in competition with Gladrags Wizarswear from now on, since the first branch of their business has been opened in Hogsmeade. The inauguration occurred last week."
"Congratulations, babies."
"Yes, congratulations from the two of us... That is all for today's flash bulletin on
Beagle Trivia!, I'm afraid. But if you would like to stay with us for Kim Jongdae's exclusive interview after the pause, please stick around and listen to our special recommended song of the day...! Talking about songs, my - YeolCaster's – personal album is also going to be coming out soon, containing both new songs and old hits from the past, such as
Hymn for a Jackass,
Onions and Pickles, and many others... Here's an oldies that everybody likes and which I recommend today for a special person of mine... Baekhyun, are you listening...? This is for you...Here is
'Oh, what a night!' by the Four Seasons; we'll be right back after the song."
Music starts playing. The grizzling sounds continue to crackle for a while, and then die along the line of the first few piano chords.
There is one final part to this. It's not really a part of the fic, but it will be titled
"Beagle Trivia", and it will basically address all the most-asked questions we've gotten from our peers about the fic, and tie up any loose ends and clear up anything that we thought might've been confusing. Please look forward to that soon!
